


we don't know where we're going, but we know where we belong

by mylifeiskara



Series: Bellarke Bingo Board [2]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bellamy Blake is a History Nerd, Bellarke Bingo, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Long-Distance Relationship, just so much fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2020-12-24 11:43:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21098924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mylifeiskara/pseuds/mylifeiskara
Summary: Clarke and Bellamy have done their whole relationship long distance. They're very much happy, and very much in love. Some days it's easy, some days it's not. And it only gets harder when they start to feel pressure from people outside their relationship to take the next step.Written for Bellarke Bingo.*Chapter 5 is a Memori chapter, which can stand on its own, or be read with the rest of the fic!*





	1. Winter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's my next fic for Bellarke Bingo! I had lots of fun writing this, because it's just a lot of fluff, which Clarke and Bellamy deserve.
> 
> **Prompts Used:** Long distance relationship + Mixtape is involved + Bellamy Blake is a history nerd (because anyone getting their PhD in history is a history nerd)
> 
> Title from [Sweet Creature](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uD6s-X3590) by Harry Styles

Clarke met Bellamy Blake when she was 24 years old. She had just started working at an art gallery in the East Village, and it was opening night of a new exhibition. She invited her roommate Raven, and one of her friends from college, Octavia, who had just moved to Brooklyn. Octavia had mentioned that her older brother was in town, but Clarke hadn’t expected her to bring him along to the opening. Bellamy was 28 and had just finished his first year in the graduate program at Stanford, working toward his PhD. He was visiting Octavia for a month before he went back to California to start his second year.

When he walked into the gallery and they locked eyes, Clarke could have sworn that time stopped. He wasn’t who she had pictured when Octavia mentioned her older brother working towards his history PhD. Octavia introduced them, and Clarke had never felt such an instant connection with someone. Later on in the evening when she didn’t have any more work related tasks to do, she gave him a tour of the gallery. Bellamy was very attentive and asked lots of thoughtful follow-up questions. At first Clarke just thought he was being polite, but as he and Octavia got ready to leave, he asked her if she’d want to get a drink later in the week. She agreed, they exchanged numbers, and the rest is history.

They took things fairly slow, spending their first few dates just talking and learning about one another. Clarke finally gave in and kissed Bellamy on their third date, when she noticed him staring at her lips and not doing anything about it. They went on walks and people watched in Washington Square Park, tried new restaurants together, and went to all the hipster food attractions Bellamy had seen videos about on Facebook. They texted all throughout the day, and it got to the point where Bellamy spent more time with Clarke than he did with Octavia, who he was supposed to be visiting. Octavia didn’t seem to mind though, since it gave her more time to spend with her new boyfriend Lincoln.

By the time Bellamy had to go back to Stanford, Clarke couldn’t imagine not seeing or talking to him everyday. It felt silly to consider doing long distance, but after a long conversation, they were both in agreement that what they had felt really special, and they weren’t ready to put a stop to it. They decided to reevaluate when Bellamy came back to the east coast for his winter break. Nothing really changed while he was gone, so they made things official almost immediately after Bellamy stepped foot back in New York that December.

It took them a couple months to really figure out a long distance relationship, since neither of them had ever been in one before. There was some trial and error when it came to communication, but they were both eager to make it work. They decided to have a Skype conversation every Sunday, supplemented by phone calls when they had time. And of course, they were constantly texting. Clarke found that she never tired of learning new things about Bellamy. He made her feel special in a way none of her exes had ever been able to, and he quickly became her best friend.

**____________________**

  
Nearly two years later, Clarke stands inside Dulles International Airport impatiently awaiting the arrival of her boyfriend. She hasn’t seen Bellamy in person since his semester started in August, and she’s been counting down the days ever since he left. Even though this has been the norm since their relationship began, the anticipation of seeing him again still feels like when they first started dating. That’s probably a good thing, though.

She finally spots him, and her heart skips a beat. His dark, curly hair is a mess around his head, probably from having his headphones on during his flight. He pushes his glasses up on his nose as he checks his phone. As he gets closer, Clarke smiles and holds up her sign that reads, “Dr. Blake”. Bellamy finally looks up, and their eyes meet. A grin breaks out on his face as he practically runs toward Clarke. When he’s only a few feet away, he drops his backpack, opens his arms, and picks her up into a spinning hug.

Clarke laughs as she hooks her legs around his waist and buries her head into the crook of his neck. She doesn’t think she’ll ever get tired of his smell. She lifts her head so that she can meet her lips with his.

“Hi,” Bellamy says as he presses his forehead to hers.

“Hi.” Clarke unwraps her legs from Bellamy’s waist and puts herself back on the ground, though she keeps her arms wrapped around his neck.

“You do know I’m not actually Dr. Blake yet, right?”

“That is so like you to get caught up in technicalities. You’re in your fourth year of a PhD program, you’re basically Dr. Blake.”

“I haven’t even finished my dissertation.”

“But you’ve started. So that’s close enough in my book.”

Bellamy chuckles before giving her another kiss. “I missed you, princess.”

“I missed you too, Bell.”

“Shall we go get my bag?” he asks, picking his backpack up from the floor.

“Yes. My mom and Marcus are gonna be in DC all day, so we have the house to ourselves.”

“Oh, well whatever shall we do to pass the time?” He grabs Clarke’s hand as he leads her towards baggage claim, Clarke laughing as she follows behind.

Later in the afternoon once they’ve had a proper reunion, Clarke lies in bed in her mother’s guest room, nestled into Bellamy. She’s calmed by the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest as he sleeps. She traces her hand over his arm, careful not to wake him, since he took the red-eye in this morning. Clarke knows that there are things she could be doing besides watching her boyfriend sleep, but a better option doesn’t come to mind. Especially considering they’ve been apart for so long. And Bellamy’s always seemed the most at peace in sleep. Hunger finally gets the better of her, so she presses a kiss to Bellamy’s bare shoulder and carefully extricates herself from his grasp, so as not to wake him. She pulls on sweatpants and a hoodie and heads downstairs into the kitchen.

Clarke starts the coffee pot, because although Bellamy likes to sleep, he never does sleep for very long, and he’s a little friendlier after his coffee. Once the coffee’s going, she looks through the kitchen to find herself something to make for lunch. She settles on a grilled cheese and gets to work. Once she’s done, she sits at the kitchen island and chews her sandwich as she scrolls aimlessly through apps on her phone.

She’s finishing up her food as she hears Bellamy’s feet padding down the stairs and into the kitchen. He’s a seasoned visitor of the Griffin-Kane household, so he knows exactly what cabinet the mugs are in. He makes a beeline for that cabinet and picks out his favorite mug—one that Clarke made when she was about ten—then goes to the coffee pot and pours himself some. He takes a sip, smiles, then finally acknowledges that Clarke is in the room by sitting down next to her and kissing her on the cheek.

“Are you hungry?” Clarke asks, nuzzling into his shoulder. “I can make you a grilled cheese.”

Bellamy only nods, seeing as he’s still mostly focused on his coffee. Clarke chuckles and gets up to gather the bread and cheese that she had put away.

They sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes, the only sound being the sizzle coming from Clarke’s frying pan. Bellamy only breaks the silence once Clarke is getting a plate for his food.

“Did you see the new song I added to the playlist?” he asks.

Clarke frowns as she hands him his sandwich and sits back down. “When did you add a song?”

“A couple weeks ago. Have you not been on Spotify recently?”

“I mean, I have. I just wasn’t listening to our playlist.”

**____________________**

_Just a little under two years ago, a couple of months into Clarke and Bellamy’s official relationship, they were having one of their weekly Skype sessions. During this particular session, Bellamy had asked Clarke what she had done that day, to which she immediately launched into a ten minute retelling of the plot of a movie she had watched earlier in the afternoon with Raven._

_“I mean, at the end of the day, it wasn’t the worst movie I’ve ever seen,” Clarke finally decided. “But I can’t say it was all that good, either. I only watched it because it was Raven’s turn to pick.”_

_Once she stopped speaking, she looked back at Bellamy on her computer screen. He had the dumbest grin on his face._

_“What? Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked._

_“It’s nothing, I just didn’t expect the whole plot of a movie when I asked how your day was,” Bellamy responded. “Now I don’t have to watch it myself.”_

_“You shouldn’t waste your time with it. Honestly, I think the only reason I enjoyed it was because it had a great soundtrack.”_

_“So you admit you liked something about it,” Bellamy countered._

_“I guess, but what does it say about the movie if the soundtrack is the only thing that evokes emotion? Shouldn’t the characters and the story do that as well?”_

_“That makes sense.”_

_“Like, Guardians of the Galaxy has a great soundtrack, but that doesn’t mean the rest of the movie is good because of it.”_

_“Hey, there are other good things about Guardians of the Galaxy besides the soundtrack!”_

_Clarke shrugged. “If you say so. But you get what I mean, right? Like a rom-com by itself can be good, but the soundtrack is what pushes it over the top and makes it great.”_

_Bellamy smiled. “Yeah, I get what you’re saying.” He paused before adding, “We should make our own soundtrack.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“I don’t know. You mentioned movie soundtracks, and it kind of seems like a fun thing to do. Make a soundtrack for our relationship. And we can listen to it when we’re missing each other. It seems kind of silly now that I’ve explained it.”_

_Clarke interrupted him before he could take the idea back. “No, Bell, that’s really sweet! Sort of like a modern day mixtape.”_

_“Yeah, I guess it would be like that.”_

_When they hung up that night, Bellamy created a collaborative playlist for them on Spotify that he called ‘Don’t Be a Stranger,’ referring to how Clarke said goodbye to him when he left to start his second year at Stanford. She had meant for it to be sweet, but she was nervous and it came out weird, so it only caused Bellamy to laugh. He still teased her about it from time to time, so she’d come to terms with the fact that she’d never be able to live that down._

_The first song Bellamy added was ‘Thinkin Bout You’ by Frank Ocean, which didn’t come as a surprise to Clarke, seeing as Bellamy had made it very clear how much he loved Frank Ocean. Clarke decided she should add a song from an artist that she had the same amount of enthusiasm for. In the end, her first addition to the playlist was ‘Lovebug’ by the Jonas Brothers. About twenty minutes after she added it, her phone started buzzing. It was Bellamy calling. She didn’t bother waiting to pick up, like she’d done in the past when she didn’t want to seem too eager. She just answered on the first ring._

_“Hi, what’s up?” she asked._

_“I didn’t realize that we were adding joke songs to the relationship playlist,” was Bellamy’s greeting._

_“Huh?”_

_“If you’re gonna add a Jonas Brothers song, I get to add ‘Uptown Girl.’ Thank you for falling for me, even though I’m crippled by student loan debt.”_

_“Bellamy, I didn’t add ‘Lovebug’ as a joke. It’s one of my favorite songs!”_

_There was a brief silence on the other end of the line. “It is?”_

_“Yeah. Am I not allowed to live in my teenage nostalgia? And if you’re adding ‘Uptown Girl’, I get to add ‘When I Kissed the Teacher’.”_

_“We’re adding ABBA to this playlist?” Bellamy groaned, though Clarke could tell from the way he said it he was smiling._

_“Okay, now. Don’t act like you’re above ABBA. Nobody is above ABBA.”_

_“I’m not even a teacher yet, I’m just a TA.”_

_“Well I’m sure you’ll be the most attractive TA the undergrad history students have this semester.”_

_Bellamy laughed. “You’re just saying that because you’re my girlfriend.”_

_It made Clarke warm inside, hearing Bellamy call her his girlfriend. She still wasn’t used to it._

_“I think I’d say it even if I weren’t your girlfriend,” she continued._

_“Whatever you say, princess.”_

_“Don’t be annoying and act like you’re not attractive when you know you are.”_

_“People have typically found me less attractive the moment I don’t shut up about the fact that I’m studying history.”_

_“Well I think that makes you even more attractive,” Clarke declared._

_“And that’s why you’re my girlfriend, and not those other people. I have to go, Clarke. I have to get to class. Don’t wanna be late to my first day as hot TA.”_

_Clarke laughed. “Oh yeah, definitely don’t wanna keep you from that. I’ll talk to you later.”_

_“Yup.”_

**_______________________**

After that, neither of them ever really questioned the songs that the other added to the playlist. The later additions are definitely a lot sappier than their fun and joke-y ones in the beginning.

The last time Clarke checked, ‘Hesitate’ by the Jonas Brothers was the last thing on the playlist. She had added it after she saw them in concert with Raven and Harper over the summer. But sure enough, there’s a new song at the bottom.

Clarke doesn’t know what to make of Bellamy’s latest addition. “You added ‘Love of My Life’ to our relationship playlist?”

“Yeah. We needed some more Queen on there,” Bellamy says before taking a bite of his sandwich.

“Yeah, and now we’ve got a whopping two Queen songs. Babe, have you listened to the lyrics of this song?”

“Why?”

“It kind of sounds like Freddie Mercury is singing about a break up.”

Bellamy frowns at this, pulls his phone out of his sweatpants pocket, and Googles the lyrics.

“I’ll admit, I never listened to it that closely. Just kinda got stuck on the title and figured I’d add it.”

Unable to calm the butterflies in her stomach after that statement, Clarke can’t help but lean over and kiss Bellamy. She smiles as she pulls away and sees that a blush is creeping over his face.

“Hey, we can’t say you didn’t try,” she giggles.

“And after looking at the lyrics, I feel like we can play it off as a couple that’s just separated. And that works for us.”

Clarke lets Bellamy try and explain his song pick for another minute before she changes the subject. She wants to remember this moment as the one where Bellamy admitted that she’s the love of his life. That’s all that matters.

**________________________**

Abby and Marcus always host Christmas dinner at their house. It might be one of Clarke’s least favorite parties of the year, but with her mother there’s just no way of getting out of it. Having Bellamy with her there the year before made that Christmas actually bearable, so she’s glad her extended family and her mom’s nosy friends didn’t scare him off completely. She figures things will be fine, since he’s back again. And she has an excuse to stand by his side the whole night, since she’s worried what would happen if he’s left alone with any of the people that attend these sorts of parties.  
****

The evening starts off normally enough. When Clarke’s mom’s friends find out Clarke’s boyfriend is in the middle of writing his dissertation, they always have questions about that, and Bellamy is always eager to explain his research to anyone who will take the time to listen. Needless to say, Clarke has heard a similar spiel about the cultural shift in Greek and Roman societies during the rise of Christianity at least thirty times by now. It’s pretty easy for her to tune out and just nod where it seems appropriate. Although, she does love to watch the way Bellamy lights up as he talks about his work to her mother’s friends.

Things get weird a little later on. A few people remember Bellamy from last year, including Thelonius Jaha, a family friend. His son Wells is Clarke’s oldest friend, but he’s out of town this Christmas, and unfortunately cannot save them from this interaction.

“It’s nice to see you again, Bellamy,” Thelonius says as he pats Bellamy on the shoulder.

“Thank you, it’s good to be back,” Bellamy answers.

“And things are going well at Stanford?”

“Yeah. I’m in the middle of my dissertation now, and if all goes according to plan, I’ll be defending in the fall.”

“It’s obviously all going to go according to plan,” Clarke interjects. “Thelonius, Bellamy is the most organized and driven person I know.”

Thelonius chuckles. “It seems like you two are well matched in that regard.”

“We seem to think so.” Bellamy smiles at Clarke, and she leans into his arm in response.

“How long have you two been together?”

“It’ll be two years on the 28th,” Clarke responds.

“How wonderful! I’m sure it’s felt like the time has flown by. And next thing you know, you’ll be getting married.”

The phrase ‘getting married’ causes Clarke to stiffen and Bellamy to choke on the sip of beer he had been taking.

Bellamy lets out a nervous chuckle. “I mean, I’m sure it’s down the line. But we’re not even engaged yet.”

“But I’m sure it’s coming,” Thelonius continues, as if Clarke and Bellamy’s brains haven’t short circuited.

“We don’t even live on the same side of the country right now,” Clarke adds. “We’re moving at our own pace.”

Thelonius seems satisfied with that answer and moves on, asking Clarke about what’s happening at the gallery.

Unfortunately, not everyone gives up their questioning so easily. Perhaps the downside to Bellamy returning for Christmas is that this sort of prying into their relationship is only going to get worse. One woman even goes so far as to say they would make gorgeous babies.

It’s not as though Clarke and Bellamy haven’t discussed marriage. They actually had conversations about it pretty early on in their relationship, when Bellamy mentioned that he had been engaged before. It was the year before he met Clarke, to a woman named Echo. Things ended fairly amicably between them, as they both realized they rushed into getting engaged because they wanted to be married, but not necessarily to each other.

Clarke is absolutely positive that Bellamy is the person she wants to spend the rest of her life with. She just wishes that people would let them stick to their own timeline. It’s nobody else’s business but theirs when they decide to get engaged or married or have kids. Clarke has only ever heard of this weird interrogation happening to other people, but now that it’s happened to her, she feels really on edge about the whole thing.

She’s still thinking about it days later when she and Bellamy are on the train back to New York. She’s trying to focus on her book, but she’s been staring at the same sentence for about ten minutes. She doesn’t even notice that she’s tapping her fingers on the armrest until Bellamy sets his hand on top of hers. When she looks up at him, she can see the worry etched into his face.

“You have been uncharacteristically quiet ever since Christmas,” Bellamy says.

“I’d say you’re starting to know me a little too well at this point,” Clarke jokes, trying to keep things light.

Bellamy just raises an eyebrow at her. Clarke is annoyed that he’s not going to let her deflect, but she does understand why. This conversation is too important to put off.

She sighs before answering. “I guess I let all my mom’s friends who asked us about getting married get in my head.”

“They did seem a lot more interested in me this time around than they were last year.”

“Well, I’ve never brought someone home more than once. I know it’s their weird way of being excited for me, but I hated that our relationship was all they seemed to want to know about.”

Bellamy nods. “I get that. Like, it’s a part of your life, but it’s not the only thing you’ve got going on.”

“Exactly.”

They sit in silence for a minute, but Clarke can tell Bellamy still has something to say. She’s honestly a little surprised he didn’t just keep speaking. She goes back to her book, figuring he’ll continue if he wants to.

“You do want to get married though, right?” he finally asks.

“Bell, of course I want to get married! That’s not what bothered me about everyone asking us about it.” Clarke is shocked that she has to assure him of this, seeing as she’s the one that usually needs verbal reassurance.

“I love you so much, and I can absolutely see us getting married and starting a family,” she continues. “I want to be engaged. To you specifically, in case that wasn’t clear.”

This gets a laugh out of Bellamy. “Great. Glad we’re on the same page.”

“I just worry because while what we have is good and it works, it’s not necessarily ideal. We’re on opposite ends of the country for most of the year. I just can’t picture us being married when we don’t live in the same place.”

“That’s understandable.” He takes a pause before speaking again. “How do you feel about long engagements?”

“I don’t mind them. I think everyone goes at their own pace, and sometimes people need the extra time.”

“Yeah, I agree.”

“Maybe we should have had more of these talks by now,” Clarke wonders aloud.

“Well, that was just the first time we’ve ever really been confronted with other people’s opinions about it. And they made it seem like we had to have it all figured out. Which we don’t. We can do whatever the hell we want. Because it’s our relationship, and we’re in charge.”

“You’re right. I kind of feel silly for letting them bother me like that.”

Bellamy takes Clarke’s hand and presses it to his lips. “There’s nothing to feel silly about. You have valid worries about a thing that most everyone in a long-term relationship worries about.”

She smiles and rests her head on Bellamy’s shoulder. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“And you’re the love of my life, too. Just so you know.”

She feels him press a kiss to the top of her head, but he doesn’t say anything. He must be getting emotional. She lifts her head to see that he is in fact trying to hold back tears. He’s not doing a very good job.

It’s in this moment that Clarke is struck by the amount of love she has for this man. It used to scare her, how much Bellamy insisted that he was lucky to be with her, almost as if she was worried that she’d never be able to live up to what he wanted and needed. In reality, Clarke is the lucky one. She’s never felt so special as when Bellamy remembers a random detail about a story she told months ago, or moments like these where he helps her talk through her problems so she freaks out less. She couldn’t ask for a better partner, and she knows without a doubt that she would marry him in a heartbeat.

**_________________________**

Once they get back to New York, the days pass fairly quickly. Clarke and Bellamy celebrate their two-year anniversary with no big fanfare. On their first anniversary, Clarke wasn’t feeling well so they sat on the couch and watched movies all day, which ended up being preferable to going out and doing something. They decide to do the same this year, ordering takeout, watching movies, and not talking to anyone else for the whole day. Clarke’s glad it’s turning out to be a tradition of theirs.

Clarke has to go to work for the couple of days leading up to New Year’s, which she doesn’t love. She loves her job, but she feels bad that she can’t spend as much time with Bellamy as she’d like before he has to go back to school. Bellamy doesn’t mind, though. He spends time catching up with Octavia and Lincoln, so at least he’s not lonely.

She knows Bellamy is excited to hang out with their whole group of friends on New Year’s Eve, especially since he’s the only one who doesn’t currently live in New York City. Their Skype conversations usually include about twenty minutes of Clarke just catching Bellamy up on what’s going on with the people in their group.

New Year’s Eve a couple years ago meant going to a bar and getting trashed. Now that they’re all a bit older, it means going to someone’s apartment and getting trashed there instead. The past couple of years, Monty and Harper have hosted the celebration at their apartment in Morningside Heights. So far they’re the only married couple in the friend group, but that’s not something that bothers Clarke, seeing as they were college sweethearts, and them getting married first was just inevitable.

Clarke and Bellamy are surprisingly not the last to arrive, even though they stopped to pick up beer on the way. When they realize Murphy and Emori are the only ones missing, they’re less surprised. Those two seem to live on their own time, and it’s a wonder they actually show up to most of their group hangouts. Harper insists on waiting until they show up to split into teams for their games, which just leads to Jasper taking bets on how much longer they’ll be while everyone else drinks and makes conversation.

After about twenty more minutes, Murphy and Emori finally show up, Murphy cradling a bottle of champagne.

“What took you guys so long?” Monty asks as he takes their coats.

“Yeah, Harper wouldn’t let us play games without you,” Jasper pouts, as he hands Raven cash for winning the bet.

Murphy smirks as he puts the champagne bottle down on the coffee table. “Sorry, we were just a little busy.”

“Busy with what?” Clarke asks.

“Busy getting engaged,” Emori answers as she holds up her hand to show off the ring, her grin getting bigger by the second.

There’s a brief moment of silence before the room erupts in excitement. This might be the first time that Clarke has ever heard Raven make any noise resembling a squeal, but that’s definitely the way to describe Raven’s reaction as she rushes to pull Murphy and Emori into a hug. Games completely forgotten, they all just spend the night celebrating the new year and the new engagement.

Clarke is so happy for Murphy and Emori. She knows how much Emori has changed Murphy’s life. When Clarke had first met him, Murphy had practically resigned himself to being alone forever. But then he met Emori, and she fit perfectly into his life. Clarke does have to admit that she’s a little surprised that they got engaged. They’re the type of couple that doesn’t like to play by the rules. They do things their way. So after a while, instead of being happy for her friends, she gets in her head about engagement and marriage, just like she had the week before.

Clarke and Bellamy are always the first to leave friend gatherings. It’s just how things are done. So nobody questions them when they say their goodbyes just a little past 1am. They walk hand-in-hand to the subway, not saying anything. She and Bellamy love silence, but this one feels more loaded than their comfortable ones.

Clarke brings it up once they’re on the train back to her apartment. “Did that whole thing feel a little weird for you, or was it just me?”

Bellamy sighs. “I guess it was weird. I mean, it wasn’t like Murphy and Emori were ever gonna break up, but I never really expected them to want to get married. I just thought they’d be that couple who’s together forever without the contract.”

“Yeah. And I love them, and I’m so happy for them.”

“But it made you think about your mom’s friends again, didn’t it?”

Clarke nods, grateful that Bellamy gets where she’s coming from.

“We just have to keep reminding ourselves that it’s not a race to see who gets down the altar first,” Bellamy says, stroking Clarke’s hand with his thumb.

“And if it feels like a race, we probably shouldn’t be getting engaged right now anyway.”

Bellamy smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Yeah, that’s a good point.”

Clarke reaches up to kiss Bellamy’s cheek. She can tell he’s upset, but it seems like he’s upset for a different reason. She decides not to pry, knowing that sometimes he just needs to stew before he talks about it, and this feels like one of those times. They don’t say anything else the rest of the train ride.

Clarke had planned on sleeping in on New Year’s Day, but her mother has other plans, because she gets a call from her around 8:30.

“Hi, Mom,” Clarke answers, not even trying to disguise the fact that she just woke up.

“Clarke, were you asleep?” her mom asks.

“Yeah. We were out late.”

“Oh, of course. You were out celebrating. Did anything exciting happen last night?”

“Murphy and Emori got engaged,” Clarke reports.

There’s silence on the other end of the line. Clarke lifts her phone from her ear to make sure it didn’t disconnect.

“That’s all?” Abby finally responds.

“You don’t find that exciting?”

“It’s not that! That’s exciting news. I’m very happy for them. Please send them my congratulations.”

“Okay. Did you need anything else, Mom? I can smell Bellamy making breakfast.”

“No, no. I just called to say Happy New Year! I’ll talk to you soon.”

She doesn’t wait for Clarke to respond before hanging up. Clarke frowns. Sure her mom is weird, but she’s not usually that weird.

Clarke untangles herself from her covers and pads into the kitchen, where Bellamy is standing over the stove making pancakes. She stops to kiss his cheek before grabbing a mug and pouring herself some coffee.

“Who were you talking to just now?” he asks.

“My mom called me. She was being really weird.”

Bellamy doesn’t respond right away. “Weird how?”

“She asked me if anything exciting happened last night, and I mentioned that Murphy and Emori got engaged, but that didn’t seem like the answer she was looking for.”

“Huh. That is weird.” He puts two pancakes onto a plate and hands it to her.

Clarke takes the plate, but doesn’t eat right away. She watches Bellamy carefully as he adds more batter to his pan.

“You know, you’ve also been acting a little weird,” Clarke mentions before taking a bite of her pancakes.

Bellamy scoffs. “No!”

“Bell, is this about Murphy proposing?”

“It’s not that exactly—”

“It’s okay if you’re more upset about it than you’re letting on. Like you said yesterday, it’s not a race to get to the altar.”

“I think I just got in my head about it.”

Clarke laughs. “I must be rubbing off on you.”

Bellamy smiles and plants a kiss on her forehead. “That’s not a bad thing. I have to remind myself to stop and think about things sometimes. It’s not a race, and we’ll get there when we get there.”

“Yeah.”

Clarke is glad that Bellamy seems a bit calmer the rest of the day than he did the night before. He also admits he’s stressed about not having gotten enough work done on his dissertation while he’s been here, and now his break is basically over. She gives him space to work on it a little before they go see _Hadestown_ that evening. Clarke got the tickets as Bellamy’s anniversary gift and something fun for them to do before Bellamy goes back to California.

For a couple hours while they’re watching the show, they both seem to forget about the pressure that’s plagued their Christmas break. They get caught up in the love stories and music. Once the show is over, Clarke is able to take a step back and realize that even though she feels ready to marry Bellamy, she’s happy with the place they’re in. They don’t need to get engaged tomorrow just because their friends did it.

Every time Clarke takes Bellamy back to the airport, it feels like the time has gone by way too fast. The couple of weeks together between their long stints apart are never enough, but Clarke cherises every second. As is tradition, before Bellamy heads to security, Clarke reminds him not to be a stranger. He always laughs.

As she’s on the way back to her apartment, she feels her phone vibrate. She sees it’s a text from Bellamy:

_I’m through security. Love you._

_Check the playlist :)_

Clarke opens Spotify to see that he’s added ‘All I’ve Ever Known’ to their playlist. When they talked about _Hadestown_ after the show, they both decided that it was one of their favorite moments in the show. She smiles as she responds to his text:

_I love you so much. Have a safe flight <3_

For the rest of her subway ride, Clarke can’t stop smiling. She knows that they’re going at their own pace, but she’s excited for whenever Bellamy does propose, because she can’t wait to say yes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! I'd love to hear what you think so far. I'll link the full playlist once I finish the story, but for now, I'll throw it back to my Ripped af days and link you guys to the songs I mentioned:
> 
> [Thinkin Bout You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6JHu3b-pbh8) by Frank Ocean
> 
> [Lovebug](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKpCDz0UjW4) by the Jonas Brothers (also an iconic video we don't talk about enough)
> 
> [Uptown Girl](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCuMWrfXG4E) by Billy Joel
> 
> [When I Kissed the Teacher](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWnKGYnuE8o) by ABBA (linking the video from the movie, because it's more fun)
> 
> [Love of My Life](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o2RwOWhhJY) by Queen
> 
> [All I've Ever Known](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5A__1-QK4w) from Hadestown
> 
> I haven't written the rest of this yet, but I have it outlined, and since it's only 4 chapters, I don't think it'll take me that long. Hope you guys enjoyed, let me know what you think! And you can always come talk to me on [Tumblr!](https://sassmasterblake.tumblr.com/)


	2. Spring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adina and Cass are legends for their feedback and encouragement this week :) 
> 
> Thanks so much for all your kudos and comments on the first chapter! My new goal with each chapter is to try and out-cute myself, and by George, I feel like I'm gonna have a hard time reaching that goal with my next chapter. Hope you enjoy.
> 
> Also, there's a very brief mention of some recreational drug use.

It’s the day before Bellamy’s spring break, and he’s sitting in the library trying to read a source for his dissertation. He hasn’t read very much since he sat down. Probably because he’s too busy thinking about Clarke to pay any real attention. She’s taking the week off to spend his break with him in California, and he’s excited to see her, but that doesn’t change the fact that his stomach’s been in knots for about a week in anticipation. They haven’t been in the same place since New Year’s, and he hopes that maybe this visit he’ll have the perfect chance to propose.

Bellamy loves Murphy. He might even be Bellamy’s best friend. But he’s still having a hard time getting over the fact that Murphy proposed to Emori the same day that he had planned to propose to Clarke. He is happy for them, and he knows he should get over it, since stewing isn’t a productive use of his time. But if all had gone according to plan in January, Bellamy wouldn’t have spent the past three days scrambling to find a new way to pop the question.

Nobody really knew that Bellamy had planned to propose to Clarke on New Year’s. He had obviously talked to Octavia about it, and he asked Abby and Marcus for their blessing when he was visiting them at Christmas. After the party he was going to reroute them so that instead of ending up at Clarke’s apartment, they’d be outside Washington Square Park. In their first month of knowing each other, they ended up talking until three in the morning on one of the benches just outside the gate. That’s where he was going to propose. Until Murphy decided to propose the same day, and then Bellamy didn’t want to feel like a copycat. It didn’t help that Clarke’s mom called her the next day to ask about her evening, but he’s still pretty sure she didn’t suspect anything.

That’s the thing about Clarke. She’s pretty perceptive. He’s a little surprised that him stewing on New Year’s didn’t tip her off completely. They’ve talked a little more about engagement in the past few months, so she probably knows it’s coming. But Bellamy still wants his proposal to be a surprise.

He checks his watch and realizes he should head to the airport. He puts his things away and walks to his car. Once he’s inside, he figures calling Octavia for some intel might be a good idea.

“Shouldn’t you be picking up Clarke right about now?” she asks in lieu of a greeting.

“I’m on my way to the airport now, thank you very much,” Bellamy responds.

“So then what do you need me for?”

“I think I’m gonna propose to Clarke while she’s here this week.”

Bellamy is glad he made this call in the car, because Octavia’s shriek on the other end of the line probably would have ruptured his eardrum.

“Oh my god! I mean, this isn’t real news since you’ve been planning to for ages, but I’m glad it’s actually gonna happen now! So what’s the plan? How, when, and where?”

“I don’t have an actual plan. I just know I want to propose this week.”

There’s silence on the other end.

Bellamy frowns. “You still there?”

“You don’t have a plan?” Octavia continues.

“It’s not like I can take her out to a nice dinner or anything like that! She’ll know something’s up. And the last time I had a plan, Murphy had to go and ruin it.”

“Bell, Murphy can’t have ruined your proposal when he didn’t know you were going to propose! Also, you guys are like good friends, how was proposing to your girlfriends not something you talked about together? Do men not do that?”

“I can’t speak for all men, but Murphy and I don’t.”

“That’s so weird to me. I talk to Clarke about everything.”

“I know. That’s why I’m calling you. I’m worried she’s gonna see it coming.”

“She won’t see it coming. She still doesn’t realize that you wanted to propose at New Year’s,” Octavia says.

“Really?” Bellamy’s a bit surprised by this.

“Shockingly, yes. She’s excited for you to propose, but based on all the conversations you guys have had recently, she just doesn’t think you’ll do it anytime soon. And she’s obviously going to say yes, so you don’t have to worry about that.”

“Yeah. Okay.” Bellamy is starting to feel jittery, and he’s not even sure when he’s actually proposing.

“It’s gonna be fine. She’s going to love whatever you do because she loves you, and she wants to be with you.”

“I know. I’m still nervous, though.”

“You’ve got this, big brother. And don’t even think about telling anybody the news that it’s happened before me,” she warns.

“I would never.”

“Just checking. Good luck, even though you don’t need it!”

“Thanks.”

Bellamy hangs up and lets the radio play as he makes the familiar drive to the airport. Not that he’s actually listening to the radio, but if it wasn’t on, his thoughts would definitely be a lot louder than they already are.

He finds a parking spot and makes his way to the arrivals section of the airport. He’s only been waiting for about ten minutes by the time he spots her. He almost has to do a double-take, because she’s gotten a haircut since their last Skype conversation. It’s shorter now, just above her shoulders in a wavy bob. It suits her, but Bellamy thinks everything suits Clarke, so he’s probably the wrong person to ask.

She waves at him as she approaches, a grin breaking out on her face. He opens his arms, and she easily steps into his embrace. He plants a kiss to her head, then pulls back so he can kiss her on the lips.

“You got a haircut!” he smiles.

Clarke chuckles. “Yeah. It felt like time for a change.”

“It looks really good.”

“Thanks.” She leans in to kiss him again.

“Shall we get food?” Bellamy asks.

“Please! I’m starving.”

Bellamy laughs as they walk hand-in-hand back to his car.

One of their favorite places to eat is a little diner near Bellamy’s apartment. They do simple comfort food really well, which Clarke is always in the mood for. They make their way to their regular booth in the back and order lunch.

Their meals when they’re first reunited always consist of Clarke catching Bellamy up on what’s going on with their New York friends, since he always leaves the group chat on do not disturb and only reads messages if he’s actively on his phone as the conversation is happening. She fills him in through bites of her BLT.

“So Jasper is trying to convince all of us that we should go to Governor’s Ball with him in June, but I don’t think I can go to a music festival and match Jasper’s drugged up energy. But you know, it’s a little weird that he ever has that much energy when he’s high, since he’s only really been smoking weed lately.”

Bellamy shakes his head. “Yeah, there’s no way I’m going to that.”

“He’ll probably convince Monty and Emori to go. And if Emori goes, Murphy and Raven will go too. But they haven’t even announced the lineup yet, so I don’t get what he’s excited about.”

“Jasper just feels like he has to be in charge of the fun since most of us are boring and coupled up.”

“He might be coupled up himself, soon. He’s started seeing someone!” Clarke responds.

“Really?”

“Yeah. Her name is Maya. She works at the coffee shop we go to in Brooklyn when we’re visiting Octavia.”

“Good for Jasper.”

“Yeah, she’s really sweet.”

Bellamy nods. “Oh, have Murphy and Emori set a date for their wedding? He texted me last week and asked me to be his best man.”

Clarke frowns. “He asked you to be his best man over text?”

“How else was he supposed to do it?”

“I mean, I know you’re not in the same place, but I feel like that might warrant at least a phone call.”

“That’s not how we do things! And you didn’t answer my question.”

“No, they haven’t set a date yet,” Clarke chuckles. “I think they’re just excited. Emori asked me to be a bridesmaid, and she took her whole bridal party out to brunch.”

“That sounds nice.”

“It was. We took a lot of cute pictures. I’ll show you my Instagram feed later.”

Clarke showing him her Instagram feed is another thing that they do when they’re reunited, since Bellamy doesn’t have Instagram. He doesn’t take enough pictures for it to seem worthwhile. And the pictures he does take are of Clarke, so it would be all around pretty boring for everyone.

“So I take it Raven’s the maid of honor?” Bellamy continues.

“Yeah. She’s really excited. I don’t know if she’ll feel that way once all the planning starts. I almost lost my mind when I was Harper’s maid of honor.”

“Wow. I’m still wrapping my mind around the concept of Murphy and Emori planning a wedding. They just strike me as the ‘let’s go to City Hall on a Wednesday’ type of couple.”

Clarke shrugs. “Some people are full of surprises. And it kind of sounds like they had originally thought of doing that, but then wanted more of a celebration. They’re both just really excited. The little engagement party they had was a lot of fun.”

“They had an engagement party?” Bellamy pouts as he stirs his straw in his soda. He might pretend like he doesn’t care, but he really doesn’t enjoy missing out.

“Yeah, it was last weekend. Did I forget to tell you about it?”

“I don’t remember you saying anything.”

Clarke extends her hand and puts it on top of his free hand. “Bell, I’m sorry. Things have been really busy at work, and it must have slipped my mind.”

“It’s not a big deal.”

“No, I know how hard it is for you to miss out on things with our friends. But all the work you’re doing here isn’t for nothing, and we understand that.”

Bellamy sighs. “I know. I just wanna be there for you guys.”

“And you are in the ways that you can be. And hey, this isn’t a forever sort of thing. You will eventually graduate, and we’ll all finally be in the same place again.”

“Clarke, the only person I really care about being in the same place as again is you.”

She smiles and leans across the booth. He meets her halfway for a quick kiss.

“I love you,” she says.

“I love you, too.” He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of saying that to her.

**____________________**

_In their first year together, Bellamy was sometimes overwhelmed by the amount of love he had for Clarke. He didn’t think he could ever love someone as much as he loved her. She came into his life at a time where he wasn’t sure he’d find someone he would even want to spend the rest of his life with. But when Octavia dragged him to that art opening (which, in hindsight, was probably on purpose), he knew almost immediately that there was something really special about Clarke Griffin. _

_In their first month of getting to know each other, Clarke admitted that her past relationships had made her a little more guarded when it came to new people. She had rushed into making things serious, and the end results didn’t work out in her favor. Bellamy nodded and said what he could to be supportive, but he didn’t know that he could relate. His most serious relationships kind of fizzled out with no huge repercussions. It was just as simple as them not being right for each other._

_Clarke having her walls up is the reason Bellamy made an unspoken rule for himself about when he could say ‘I love you’ for the first time. He knew pretty early on that he was falling in love, probably within their first official month together, but he didn’t want to scare her off or anything like that, so he figured he should wait to say it. And based on all their conversations, Bellamy just assumed that he’d be the first to let an ‘I love you’ slip._

_Bellamy’s guidelines for when he could drop the L word were pretty simple. He figured he shouldn’t say it before three months. He definitely felt like he could wait three months. He also wanted to wait to say it in person. He wanted to be able to hold her hand and really look her in the eye when he said it for the first time. _

_About two and a half months into their relationship, Bellamy was absolutely positive he was in love with Clarke. He loved the way she lit up when she talked about things she was passionate about. He loved the way she cared about her friends. He loved the little embarrassed blush that would flood her cheeks when he paid her a compliment. He loved her smile. He loved her._

_After this realization, Bellamy found himself exercising a great deal of restraint, afraid he would just let it slip. He almost did once, before hanging up when they were talking on the phone. He was able to play it off, but it was a close call. It was a lot harder when they were Skyping, because just looking at Clarke made him want to blurt it out._

_They were having a Skype conversation one Sunday afternoon when it happened. Bellamy was in the thick of working on his proposal for his dissertation, and he was glad of the break and for the time he got to spend with Clarke, even if they weren’t in the same place._

_“So what do you think it’s gonna be about?” Clarke asked._

_Bellamy chuckled. “You don’t really want to hear about it.”_

_“Yes, I do. My boyfriend is working towards a PhD in a subject he loves, and I want to know more about it.”_

_That sentence made Bellamy love Clarke even more. She genuinely wanted to know about what he was working on, which he had never experienced with anyone he’d dated in the past._

_“Well, I’ve always been interested in ancient Rome and their religious practices. And there was such a shift, especially when Christianity was introduced, and Constantine stopped the persecution of Christians. So I think I want to talk about religious practices in ancient Rome, while also briefly comparing those to religious practices in ancient Greece.”_

_“Aren’t they kind of one and the same?” Clarke interrupted. “I mean, I know the gods have different names, but don’t they all serve the same purpose?”_

_Bellamy lit up, excited to explain further. “Actually, there are some significant differences in Greek and Roman religious practices, which is why I think it’ll be fun to compare! There’s a lot of distinctions in the way that they worshipped. In ancient Greece there was a lot of emphasis on divine grace of the gods, whereas in Rome it was more about divine law. There was a sort of trust between god and man, that the gods would guide the people to live successfully.”_

_He stopped talking, because he didn’t want to bore Clarke for too long. He looked at his computer screen and noticed she was grinning from ear to ear. His history tangents had never made anyone do that before._

_“What?” he finally asked._

_“Nothing! It’s just cute how excited you get when you talk about history.”_

_“I think that’s the nicest way anybody has ever called me a nerd,” Bellamy laughed._

_Clarke giggled. “But you’re my nerd, and I love you.”_

_Bellamy felt his stomach flip as he heard those words come out of Clarke’s mouth. He almost wasn’t sure she had actually said them._

_“You what?” Bellamy asked, trying to contain the smile that was forming on his face._

_Clarke seemed shocked, as though she hadn’t expected to let that slip. “Um, forget I said anything. It’s not a big deal. I didn’t mean to say it so soon.”_

_“Hey, it’s okay. I love you, too.”_

_“Really?” she asked, letting out a deep breath._

_“Yeah.” He could feel tears beginning to well in his eyes._

_“Baby, are you crying?” Clarke asked._

_“Just a little,” Bellamy responded as he wiped a few tears from his face. “I’m just happy.”_

_She smiled back at him. “Me too.”_

_“God, I wish I could kiss you right now.”_

_“Well when we see each other again, it’s just gonna have to be your best kiss ever.”_

_Even after he hung up with Clarke that afternoon, Bellamy was still in shock. He hadn’t expected her to say ‘I love you’ first, but he was so glad she did. It made it more special having her say it first, since it meant that she trusted Bellamy and felt safe enough with him to express herself. _

_It was in that moment that Bellamy knew without a doubt that this relationship was worth it, even if they were apart most of the time. It was also probably the moment he knew he wanted to marry her, but the thought didn’t really cross his mind at the time. _

**___________________**

The first day of Bellamy’s spring break is a chill one. He has to work a little bit on his dissertation, and Clarke brought some work of her own she could do. They have a lazy morning, then spend the afternoon sitting on Bellamy’s couch and working on their respective laptops. Clarke puts her legs in Bellamy’s lap, so that Bellamy’s laptop rests on a pillow on top of her legs.

It’s a wonder that Bellamy gets any work done with Clarke around, but she does tend to help keep him on task. When he feels like he needs a break, he takes a moment to just look at her engrossed in her work. Her new short hair looks really cute in the half up style she always dons when she needs to concentrate. She frowns at something on her computer screen and then makes a note in her notebook. She must eventually feel him staring, because she looks up from what she’s doing.

“What?” she asks, a blush setting in on her face.

Bellamy grins. “Nothing. I just like looking at you.”

Clarke laughs, then turns back to her notebook. “Shut up and work on your dissertation.”

Eventually Bellamy follows suit and turns back to the chapter he’s working on. He feels so at ease when he and Clarke are in the same place. He loves the quiet moments they get to have that can’t be replicated over Skype. It’s a small glimpse into their future, which Bellamy gets more and more excited about with every passing day. Even though he doesn’t love the idea of proposing to Clarke and then not being able to see her for a few months, he thinks if he doesn’t get to call her his fianceé soon, he might explode. It’s then and there that he decides he’s going to propose tomorrow when they’re in San Francisco. He’s still not sure how, but he knows he has to do it.

The next day, Bellamy is a bundle of nerves. He doesn’t remember being nearly this nervous when he almost proposed back in January, so he’s not sure what’s different today, aside from the fact that it’s actually happening. When Clarke is in the shower, he goes into his sock drawer, takes out the ring box, and puts it in his jacket pocket, since those pockets zip.

He and Clarke have a scheduled brewery tour in the early afternoon, and then they’re just going to walk around and enjoy each other’s company for the rest of the day. Bellamy’s still not sure when in the day he’s going to actually pop the question, but he figures that he’ll know when the time is right.

The drive to San Francisco is not long, but it somehow feels longer today. Bellamy tries to calm himself by listening to the sound of Clarke’s voice as she talks about the possible summer project she might be doing for the gallery, but it’s not working.

“Bell?” Clarke finally asks. “Is everything okay?”

“Hmm?” He really hadn’t been paying attention.

“I don’t think you heard any of what I just said. What’s got you all distracted today?”

“I’m not distracted!” Bellamy scoffs.

Clarke doesn’t respond, but Bellamy takes his eyes off the road for a moment to see that she clearly didn’t buy that load of bullshit. He has to find another way to play this off.

“To be honest, I really just have to go to the bathroom,” he lies.

“You didn’t go before we left your apartment?”

“I forgot.”

“Well it’s a good thing we’re not that far away.”

He nods and turns his attention back to the road. Clarke seems satisfied with that excuse for now, but Bellamy knows she’ll be even more suspicious if he drops the ball again.

Once they reach San Francisco, they head straight for Anchor Brewing, where they’re doing their tour. Bellamy parks the car, and they get out and walk toward the building. There’s still about twenty minutes before the tour starts.

“We should check in, and then you can go to the bathroom,” Clarke says as she takes Bellamy’s hand.

Bellamy frowns. “What?”

“Didn’t you say you had to go to the bathroom earlier?”

“Right! Yes, let’s do that.”

They check in for their tour, and then Bellamy walks in the direction of the bathroom and stands off by himself for a minute, since he did in fact use the bathroom before they left his apartment.

Bellamy does his best to pay attention during the brewery tour, or at least make it look like he’s paying attention. Clarke seems to be keeping her eye on him, which doesn’t help to settle his nerves. He does relax a bit, thanks to the tasting after the official tour ends. Even so, he knows he has to propose within the next hour or so for his own peace of mind.

Since they don’t have any real plans for the rest of the day, Bellamy suggests that they drive to Golden Gate Park and do what they do best: people watch. Clarke seems very excited by the idea. They stop for tacos and then make their way to the park. Bellamy keeps his eyes open for a spot in the park where there’s some foot traffic, but it’s secluded enough so that when the time is right, he doesn’t have to ask Clarke to marry him with a crowd of people around. They find a good spot easily, seeing as it’s the end of March and still a bit chilly outside. They sit on a bench, just relishing each other’s company.

“This was a good idea,” Clarke says in between bites of her taco. “Just like old times.”

“Yeah. Thanks for spending my spring break with me,” Bellamy smiles.

“Of course! And not that I need an excuse to come visit you, but this lined up really well with what was going on at work.”

“I’m glad.”

Clarke kisses him on the cheek, and Bellamy feels his face heat up a bit, like it’s the first time she’s kissing his cheek all over again. He thanks whatever higher being there is that she’s a fast eater, because he doesn’t really think she’d appreciate him proposing while her mouth is full. Bellamy tries to take a bite of his own taco, but finds that his stomach is a little too nervous to eat anything right now.

“Are you gonna finish that?” Clarke asks, eyeing Bellamy’s food.

“You can have it. I’ll just eat the chips.”

She nods and takes his taco out of its container. Bellamy pats his jacket pocket to check that the ring’s there, even though that pocket has stayed zipped all day, and he rationally knows it wouldn’t have gone anywhere. Then again, he’s not really being rational right about now.

“You are so spacey today,” Clarke observes. “You haven’t even said anything about that cute toddler chasing its puppy with a stick!”

“What? Where?” Bellamy asks, feigning interest. He’s usually a sucker for cute babies, but this is the perfect opportunity to have Clarke distracted for long enough to actually make this proposal happen.

“Over by the tree, don’t you see? And the dog is so cute!”

Clarke takes out her phone to snap a couple pictures. The baby has stopped running with the stick, but the dog is still jumping and playing. While she’s distracted, Bellamy unzips his jacket pocket, pulls out the ring box, takes a deep breath, then taps Clarke on the shoulder.

She turns around to show him the pictures, but stops short and gasps when she sees what’s in Bellamy’s hand.

“So, two summers ago when I was visiting Octavia, I almost didn’t go with her to your exhibition opening, because I was in a bad mood. But she dragged me there anyway, and I’m so very glad she did. Because meeting you changed my life for the better.”

Clarke chokes out a cross between a laugh and a sob. Bellamy is starting to well up himself, which kind of makes him wish he had rehearsed what he was going to say.

“I have never loved anyone as deeply as I love you,” he continues shakily. “You push me to be a better version of myself everyday, and you support me and all of the nerdy things I love. There is nobody else in the world that I would rather spend the rest of my life with.”

At this point, Bellamy gets off the bench to bend down on one knee. He opens the ring box, which warrants another gasp from Clarke. Tears are openly streaming down her face, and she has the biggest smile that Bellamy has ever seen.

“Clarke Elizabeth Griffin, will you marry me?” Bellamy asks.

“Yes! Yes, of course!” Clarke laughs.

Bellamy laughs too, relieved that this is finally happening. He slides the diamond ring onto Clarke’s left ring finger, wipes tears from his eyes, and wraps her in a hug.

She pulls back from the hug so she can take his face in her hands and kiss him. They’re both smiling too much for the kiss to be any good, but Bellamy can’t bring himself to care. He’s engaged!

“You’re my fiancé!” Clarke giggles.

Bellamy doesn’t know why he was so worried all day, when he knew deep down it would end well. He’s bursting with pride that the woman he loves more than anything in the world wants to be with him forever. It’s all he could ask for, honestly.

“What do we do now?” Bellamy mumbles into Clarke’s shoulder.

Clarke moves her head so she’s looking at Bellamy. “I don’t know. I’ve never been engaged before.”

“Well it’s a wonder I made it this far without blacking out, so I don’t really have a plan for what to do next.”

She laughs at this. “We don’t have to do anything. We can just sit here. At least until I decide I’m cold.”

Bellamy chuckles, but finally gets off the ground and sits back on the bench next to Clarke. His fianceé. He puts his arm around her, and she rests her head on his shoulder. He presses a kiss to her hair, then rests his head on top of hers. Bellamy relishes in the silence, as he and Clarke get to just be, which is a rare occurrence for them. Every so often he notices Clarke stare down at her left hand and admire the ring on her finger, which almost makes him well up all over again.

After a while Clarke announces that she’s cold, and they gather their things and head back to the car. Suddenly, San Francisco doesn’t seem all that interesting anymore. They start the drive back to Bellamy’s apartment in Palo Alto.

“We have to tell people now!” Clarke remembers.

“We have to call O first, or she’ll never forgive me.”

Clarke nods, dials Octavia, and puts her phone on speaker.

Predictably, she picks up on the first ring.

“Hi!” From the excitement in her voice, Bellamy can tell she knows exactly what this call is about, especially since she’s clearly not at home. There’s a lot of noise in the background.

“Hey,” Clarke answers. “Where are you?”

“Monty and Harper’s. We’re having a movie night.”

“Oh. Well, I assume you know what this call is about, since you picked up in the middle of a movie, but Bellamy and I are engaged.”

Octavia screams. There’s shouting on the other end of the line, seeing as none of them know what’s going on.

“Okay, I’ve put you guys on speaker,” Octavia continues. “Say it again.”

“Hi, this is Bellamy,” Bellamy replies. “I proposed to Clarke this afternoon, and she said yes.”

Now there’s shouting on the other end of the line because everyone is excited. Bellamy and Clarke exchange a glance as their friends continue screaming.

“You guys! Congratulations!” someone says. Bellamy assumes it’s Harper.

“Mom and Dad! Fucking finally!” And that’s definitely Jasper.

“It’s about damn time,” Murphy adds.

“Fuck you, Murphy. We go at our own pace!” Bellamy responds, but there’s no bite behind it. He’s too happy.

“You have to send pictures of the ring,” Raven eventually chimes in.

Clarke laughs. “I will in a bit. We’re in the car right now. We love you guys.”

“We love you too!” their friends repeat back.

“Okay, it’s just me again,” Octavia says. “I just wanted to say that I love you both so much, and I’m so incredibly happy for you!”

Bellamy smiles. “We love you too, O. Are you happy now that all your meddling worked out?”

“Oh please, I barely had to do any meddling to get you two together.”

“So you admit it! Bringing me to that art opening was meddling.”

“Yeah. And look what it got you. A whole fianceé. You’re welcome.”

Bellamy rolls his eyes at this, but it makes Clarke laugh.

Octavia eventually continues. “But seriously, you guys are perfect for each other. Now stop talking to me and go celebrate! You have the whole rest of the week to live it up!”

They say goodbye to Octavia and continue on their drive back to Palo Alto. Clarke calls her mom to share the news. There’s a lot less screaming on that phone call, though Abby does let out one excited shriek.

Before heading back to Bellamy’s apartment, they stop at the liquor store around the corner to buy a bottle of champagne. Octavia told them to celebrate, so they’re going to celebrate.

While Bellamy gets glasses for their champagne, Clarke queues up their Spotify playlist. He notices that she purposely skips the silly songs at the beginning to get to the sappy ones later on. Bellamy can’t seem to wipe the grin off his face as he joins her in his living room. He pops the bottle and pours them each a glass. He hands Clarke one and then lifts his in a toast.

“To the love of my life, and to our first evening as an engaged couple,” Bellamy says.

“And to our future together,” Clarke adds.

“Cheers.”

They clink glasses and sip their drinks. At this point, ‘One and Only’ by Adele starts on the speaker.

Bellamy frowns. “I don’t remember putting this on the playlist.”

“You didn’t. I just added it.”

She takes Bellamy’s glass and sets it down next to hers on the coffee table. She extends her hand, smiling up at him. His grin somehow gets bigger as he takes her hand and they sway back and forth to the music.

“I love you so much,” Bellamy says.

“Me too.” She rests her head on his chest as they continue to hold each other and dance.

Bellamy’s heart is so full that he’s surprised he hasn’t burst yet. He couldn’t have asked for a more perfect day with his favorite person in the entire world. He doesn’t want this moment of holding her close to end. But then he remembers that he gets to have moments like these with her for the rest of his life, and he can’t wait for this new part of their journey together to start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed! I'm still writing this as I go, so not sure when the next update will be, but it'll probably be a similar time frame as this chapter.
> 
> Have a link to [One and Only](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLla9PYtcoc) by Adele.
> 
> Come find to me on [Tumblr!](https://mylifeiskara.tumblr.com/)


	3. Summer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for leaving kudos and comments! I'm glad you guys are liking the story so far, and I'm excited to keep working on it.
> 
> I'm sad I didn't really have time to do Bellarke Bingo Blast this week, but I am happy that I was able to finish this chapter earlier than I had planned! 
> 
> I'm also able to cross "Teacher Bellamy" off my card with this chapter, so I'm excited about that as well.

Clarke has been engaged to Bellamy for two months, and it feels like she’s been riding on a high ever since he asked her to marry him. Just thinking about getting to spend forever with him makes her giddy in a way she didn’t even know was possible. She’s even more giddy that they get to spend most of the summer together. Bellamy is back in New York to teach a summer course at Columbia. It’s his first class he’ll be teaching by himself, and Clarke’s been calling him Professor Blake ever since he got the job. She hasn’t said this to Bellamy, but she’s hoping that the summer course goes well enough that maybe they’ll want him to come back when he’s finished his PhD, but Clarke doesn’t really know how any of this academia stuff works. She doesn’t want to get her hopes up on a pipe dream.

The first Saturday in June finds Clarke on the rooftop of a fancy Manhattan restaurant celebrating her engagement. She hadn’t wanted a big party, especially since so much time had passed since she and Bellamy actually got engaged. But Abby Griffin was nothing if not persistent, and insisted on throwing them a party once Bellamy was back in New York. Clarke was more on board with the idea once her mom let her be in charge of the guest list.

Clarke doesn’t love that she has to spend a portion of the party posing with Bellamy for pictures, but her mother insists. She’s sure she’ll appreciate the photos when she looks back on this day, but right now she just wants to spend time with Bellamy and their friends. Though, the sooner they finish the pictures, the sooner Clarke can actually enjoy her own party.

The photographer has them pose with the skyline in the background. Clarke places her left hand on Bellamy’s chest (per her mother’s instructions to show off the ring) and smiles up at him. He grins back, his arms wrapped around her waist, as the photographer continues to snap pictures. Were it not for the fact that Bellamy is holding her, Clarke would say this photoshoot is taking far too long. But she’s always happy when she’s in Bellamy’s arms.

Once they’re finished with pictures, Clarke taps a knife to her wine glass in an attempt to get everyone’s attention.

“Hi! I just wanted to take a moment and thank everyone for coming out tonight to celebrate with us,” Clarke begins. “Now if you really know us, you’ll know that usually Bellamy’s the one that gives the big and inspiring speeches, while I stand and watch in the corner. But I thought we’d switch things up today.”

“Two years ago, I wasn’t looking for anything serious. I figured there was no point in forcing something that’s just gonna end badly. I don’t know why, and I’ve learned to stop questioning it, but Bellamy came into my life and I suddenly felt like it was okay to love again.”

She notices Bellamy beginning to tear up and grabs his hand before continuing her speech.

“Bellamy, you are my rock and my best friend. I am constantly in awe of the way you care about others, whether they’re your friends or people you’re meeting for the first time. You always talk about how you’re lucky to be with me, but I am so lucky to be with someone with such a big heart. I wake up everyday feeling like I’ve won the lottery, and I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you. And yes, I fully gave this speech with the intention of making you cry.”

Bellamy laughs along with the other guests. He’s fully crying now, but doesn’t want to let go of Clarke’s hand to wipe his eyes.

She lifts her glass once Bellamy seems okay for her to continue. “So let’s raise a glass. To best friends and soulmates.”

Everyone raises their glasses and toasts to Clarke and Bellamy.

“Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss,” comes a chant (no doubt started by Jasper) from the table their friends are occupying. Surprisingly, it catches on, and the whole party is chanting, waiting expectantly for Clarke and Bellamy to kiss.

“I mean, we have to give the people what they want,” Bellamy jokes.

Clarke laughs before tilting her head up and meeting her fiancé halfway for a brief kiss. Their guests cheer and then go back to chatting with each other.

“Should we do our rounds so we can enjoy the party, too?” Clarke asks.

“Yeah, might as well get that out of the way,” Bellamy says. They walk hand-in-hand over to their friends’ table.

“Clarke, it’s important to me that you know you made Jasper cry with your heartfelt speech,” Monty says as they approach.

“Can’t say I’m surprised,” Clarke answers. “But I’m glad I was able to make someone besides Bellamy emotional.”

“Yeah, try the whole party,” Jasper sniffs, clearly still recovering.

“Your love is sickening,” Murphy adds, which causes Emori to elbow him. “In the cutest possible way.”

“We love you too, Murphy,” Bellamy chuckles, prompting Murphy to give him the finger in response.

“You guys, this party is so nice,” Harper muses.

“Yeah, I don’t think I could afford to eat here,” Raven adds.

Clarke gets quiet. She’s never really sure to say when her friends bring money into their conversations. She normally just prays the moment passes as quickly as it started.

“Abby and Marcus were nice enough to pay for the party, so you can afford to eat here at least for tonight, Raven,” Bellamy continues. He must have picked up on Clarke’s mood shift, and she’s glad he did.

“I wish I had a rich family to pay for everything. Emori, this kind of puts our engagement party to shame,” Murphy says.

Emori cuts in, glaring at her fiancé. “A party doesn’t have to be extravagant for it to be a good party.”

“And you guys had a great engagement party. You were surrounded by people who love and care about you, and that’s what’s important,” Clarke says.

“Still wish I could’ve been there,” Bellamy pouts.

“You would’ve been there if you could, and that’s what counts,” Emori reassures him. “And what’s important is that you’re at the wedding.”

Murphy snorts. “I’ll say. I don’t see how we can have a wedding without the best man.”

Bellamy laughs, Murphy’s joke allowing him to loosen up again. Clarke and Bellamy talk to their friends for a few more minutes before continuing their rounds.

Greeting the rest of their guests is mostly painless. A few people ask them if they’ve set a date, but they answer honestly by saying they’re just enjoying being engaged, and that they’ll think about setting a date after Bellamy defends his dissertation. Everyone finds that response acceptable.

It’s when they finally reach Clarke’s mom and stepdad that things get a little dicey.

“Abby, Marcus, I don’t think I can adequately express how much this party means to us. Thank you so much,” Bellamy begins.

“It’s our pleasure,” Marcus smiles, patting Bellamy’s shoulder.

“It’s just our way of saying we’re glad you’re part of the family now, Bellamy,” Abby continues.

Clarke squeezes Bellamy’s hand and leans into him. Hearing her mom say that means a lot to her, and she’s sure Bellamy is over the moon about it.

“Thank you. That means a lot,” Bellamy says.

“The food is really good, Mom. How did you find this restaurant?” Clarke asks.

“Oh, I was searching for places that cater weddings, and this was one that came up. Then I saw that they did private events, and I thought it would be a good spot for your engagement party.”

“You’re looking for a caterer already? We haven’t even set a date.”

Abby chuckles. “I guess I got a little carried away. I’m just excited to get into the planning. Bellamy, I don’t know if you know this, but I’ve been putting away money for Clarke’s wedding since she was able to walk.”

Clarke tenses up at the mention of her wedding fund. She’s been telling her mom to put that money towards something else for ages, but she refuses to listen.

Bellamy’s eyes widen. “No, Clarke didn’t tell me about that. That’s also very generous of you.”

“We really just want something simple, Mom. We might not have a date set, but we know that much.”

“Have you thought about when you’re setting the date?” Marcus asks.

“I mean, there’s no real rush,” Bellamy says. “We’re kind of just enjoying being engaged.”

Clarke nods. “And we still live on opposite sides of the country most of the year. I think we’ll talk more about it once Bellamy’s finished with his degree.”

“Do you think you’ll move back to New York after you’ve graduated?” Abby asks.

“It’s hard to say at the moment. It somewhat depends on job opportunities. But I’m obviously looking into things on the east coast.”

Thankfully Abby and Marcus are satisfied by Bellamy’s response.

“Well, you’ve still got some time. But keep me posted, because I’ve already found a great wedding planner!” Abby brags before walking off to say hello to someone else.

“You two enjoy the rest of your party,” Marcus smiles, following after his wife.

Clarke looks at Bellamy and lets out a sigh. He smiles, but she can tell he’s a little out of his element. She turns to face him.

“Hey. I’m sorry about that. I’ve tried to talk her down about the stupid wedding fund before, but she’s always been too excited to listen. Even before there was somebody I was actually marrying.”

“It’s not your fault,” Bellamy insists. “If she’s going to be my mother-in-law, I should probably get used to how she talks about money.”

“Yeah, but within reason. I’ve even told her she should save it all for our non-existent first child instead. The thought of a grandchild didn’t even distract her!”

Bellamy grins. “You told your mom to save money for our non-existent first child?”

Clarke chuckles. “I mean, yeah. College is gonna cost an astronomical amount of money by the time our kids are old enough to go.”

He nudges her playfully. “Kids?”

“Okay, yes, kids! We’ll obviously have a longer talk about that later, but that’s not the point of this conversation!”

Bellamy wraps Clarke in his arms and she does nothing to stop him. They’re going to have to have an actual conversation about her mom’s money habits when they’re not at a party thrown in their honor, but for the first time in a while, the idea of talking about money doesn’t turn Clarke’s stomach to knots. She knows she and Bellamy can face anything together, so this conversation seems like it’ll be the least of her worries.

**____________________**

_Clarke and Bellamy hadn’t even been together a full year, but she knew without a doubt in her mind that she could picture spending forever with him. That’s probably why she dedicated almost ten minutes of her weekly phone calls with her mom to talking about him. They didn’t even live in the same place, but she always knew what was going on with him, since they were almost always in constant communication._

_It was one afternoon in October when Clarke’s mom made her first remark about how often Clarke mentioned Bellamy during their phone calls._

_“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk this much about someone you’ve dated before,” Abby said._

_Clarke didn’t answer right away, not sure if this was a good or bad thing. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”_

_“I didn’t mean to suggest it was a bad thing. I meant the opposite. You haven’t seemed this happy in a while.”_

_She smiled, even though her mom couldn’t see her. “I am really happy, Mom. I know our situation isn’t ideal, what with him being at Stanford most of the year. But I love him, and I really want it to work.”_

_“He sounds wonderful, sweetie. I’d love to meet him. But only when you feel like you’re ready.”_

_“I do want you to meet him. I’m just not sure when there’ll be a chance any time soon.”_

_“What about Thanksgiving?” Abby suggested. “You’re already coming to visit, it seems like the perfect time.”_

_“I thought you liked to have Thanksgiving just you, me, and Marcus?”_

_“If this Bellamy is so important to you, I think we can make an exception. And you know Marcus loves to have new people to cook for.”_

_Clarke chuckled. Her stepdad did love to try out new recipes on unsuspecting guests. But she had a feeling Bellamy would find it endearing._

_“He might already have plans, though. What if he’s doing something with Octavia?”_

_“Well you’ll never know if you don’t ask. But he’s most definitely welcome,” Abby responded._

_Clarke was glad that her mom seemed so on board with meeting her boyfriend. She knew all her mom wanted was for her to be happy with a good person, but Abby had never been this eager to meet any of her exes. She didn’t question it, though. She just took it as a sign that Bellamy really was special. Maybe even the one. _

_That Sunday during their Skype session, Clarke told Bellamy the news._

_“So, I guess I’ve been talking about you so much to my mom that she wants to meet you,” Clarke mentioned._

_Bellamy perked up at this news. “Really?”_

_“Yeah. She even wanted to know if you’d be able to come for Thanksgiving, but I told her you probably already have plans.”_

_“I don’t have plans, but I don’t think I’ll be able to make it. Tell her thank you for the invitation, though.”_

_Clarke frowned. “You don’t have plans with Octavia?” _

_“I mean, we’ll probably talk on the phone that day.” Bellamy shrugged._

_“So you’re spending Thanksgiving alone?”_

_“I’m not spending it alone. Last year my friend Miller and I hung out, so we’ll probably do that again. He makes great mac and cheese.”_

_Clarke wasn’t sure what to say. She didn’t get why Bellamy would rather spend Thanksgiving alone than be with his sister. And if he wasn’t going to be with his sister, why didn’t he want to come home with Clarke?_

_“Clarke? Did you freeze?” Bellamy asked, after she hadn’t responded._

_“No, I didn’t freeze. I guess I’m just confused.”_

_“Confused about what?”_

_She shook her head. “It’s silly.”_

_“Hey, it’s okay. You can tell me.”_

_“I don’t want you to think I’m acting jealous or anything like that.”_

_“Clarke, we promised we’d be honest and talk through things together, even if they were tough.”_

_Clarke knew she wasn’t going to get out of talking about this that easily. She took a deep breath before continuing._

_“Do you not want to meet my parents?” she asked, feeling silly now that she’d said it out loud._

_Bellamy frowned. “Of course I want to meet them. Why would you think I didn’t?”_

_“Well, if you’re not spending Thanksgiving with your own family, I don’t get why you wouldn’t want to come to Virginia to meet my mom and stepdad.”_

_“Clarke, that’s not it at all. I would love to meet your mom and stepdad. I just can’t afford a cross-country plane ticket for a long weekend,” he explained._

_“Oh. Well if that’s all, I could always just buy your ticket.”_

_Bellamy shook his head. “You don’t have to do that.”_

_“I don’t mind. Or I could talk to my mom. She offered to pay for my train ticket, so I’m sure she’d be willing to pay for your flight.”_

_He started to look more uncomfortable. “My plane ticket would be way more expensive than your train from New York.”_

_“She wouldn’t mind, I promise.” Why was he being so weird?_

_“It really won’t be necessary.”_

_“It’s not a big deal, Bell,” Clarke insisted._

_“It’s a big deal to me!” he snapped. _

_Clarke paused. She’d never known Bellamy to lose his temper, so she wasn’t sure what she should do next, especially when she didn’t know what was the matter._

_Bellamy took a breath before speaking again. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap.”_

_“I just want to understand what’s going on in your head,” Clarke said._

_“I know, I know. And we should probably have this conversation now, rather than wait.”_

_“Have a conversation about what?”_

_“We have very different relationships with money,” Bellamy answered._

_“And is that a bad thing?”_

_“No, not necessarily. I just think it’s something we should discuss. I didn’t grow up with a lot of money. I’m lucky that a scholarship paid for most of my undergrad, but I’ve always had to work other jobs.”_

_Clarke nodded, but let Bellamy continue talking, since she couldn’t relate to this particular thing._

_“And it’s kind of the nature of my profession that I’m not gonna see much money until I get tenure somewhere or I somehow write a best-selling book. Needless to say, I’ve always lived on a budget.”_

_“You wouldn’t have to pay me back, if that’s what you’re thinking,” Clarke added, in case that was his hesitation. “And my mom would insist it’s a gift.”_

_“That’s the thing, though. I can’t say that I’m comfortable with that. It would feel like I owe you something, and I don’t want to feel that way. It doesn’t have to make sense to you, but that’s just how I feel. I like to be able to pay my own way. Sure, I miss out on things, but I’ve found that paying rent and being able to eat are more important most of the time,” he continued._

_“I never thought about it like that,” Clarke admitted._

_“Well, I don’t mean to assume things about your upbringing, but I could have guessed that based on how you talk about money.”_

_Clarke blushed at that. Nobody had ever stopped to talk about money with her in such a frank way before. But Bellamy was right. She’d never really worried about money. She’d never needed to. She only got her first job babysitting when she was fourteen because all her friends were doing it, and her mom wouldn’t raise her allowance anymore. There had been a college fund set up for her before she was born. And though Clarke put down the security deposit and paid her rent all on her own, she and Raven wouldn’t have furniture nearly as nice as they did if it hadn’t been for her mom helping them out. Clarke had gotten better about saving money after her first year of living in New York and realizing how expensive it actually was, but she always knew in the back of her mind that she had her mom’s help to fall back on. She’d always thought of herself as resourceful and independent, but maybe she wasn’t as resourceful and independent as she thought._

_“Huh,” she finally said._

_“What?”_

_“Nothing, it’s just that I’ve worked so hard to call myself independent, but I’ve never not relied on my mom’s help.”_

_Bellamy chuckled. “Well you’re only 25. Good to have figured that out now, rather than realize it much later.”_

_“I just thought I had it all figured out.”_

_“Clarke, nobody has it all figured out. And you’re still pretty independent. It’s not like your mom has helped you get any of the jobs you’ve had.”_

_“That’s true.”_

_“And some rich kids can’t say the same,” Bellamy pointed out._

_“I wouldn’t say we’re rich. More like comfortable.”_

_Bellamy grinned. “That’s exactly what a rich person would say, princess.”_

_Clarke let out a laugh at the almost too perfect use of his nickname for her. People used to mock her by calling her princess in college, so she’d hated it for a while. But when Bellamy said it with such awe in his voice, it didn’t make her feel weird or singled out. It made her feel special. _

_“I guess I’ll tell my mom you can’t make it for Thanksgiving. Would you maybe want to come for Christmas instead?”_

_“Yeah, I think we could arrange that. I plan to come back to the east coast for at least a few weeks when I’m on winter break.”_

_“Okay. I’m sure she’ll be excited to meet you then. And Marcus makes so many desserts around the holidays, you’ll absolutely love it,” Clarke insisted._

_“I can’t wait. Tell me more about the desserts.”_

_Clarke continued on, recounting the tale of the first time she had Marcus’ pecan pie._

**________________**

Bellamy might be back on the east coast for the summer, but Clarke unfortunately has to be the one to travel. Her boss has contacts in Florence and Milan and she asked Clarke to come along to help her scout new pieces for the gallery. In most circumstances, a trip to Italy wouldn’t seem like such a sad thing, if it weren’t for the fact that it meant she’d be away from Bellamy for two weeks when they had planned to spend the whole summer together.

Clarke’s mom had also somehow turned this work trip into an excuse to take her own European vacation, so she’s going to be spending two weeks in Italy with her mom and Niylah, while Bellamy is back in New York teaching. She knows it won’t be that bad once she gets there, but it doesn’t exactly sound like the most relaxing trip.

They land in Milan, and Niylah and Clarke spend the first few days keeping busy with meetings, while Abby spends time sightseeing and shopping. On the first Wednesday there, there’s finally a lull in work, and Clarke agrees to meet her mom for lunch.

They’ve finished eating, but they sit outside at the cafe and sip on their coffee. Clarke pushes her sunglasses further up on her nose as she watches people walk by. People watching isn’t nearly as fun without Bellamy.

“You’re very distracted today,” Abby remarks before taking a sip of her coffee.

“I just miss Bellamy,” Clarke admits. “I know this trip is a good job opportunity, and it means Niylah trusts me, but I don’t love the timing.”

“Well you’re already halfway through the first week. You’ll be back in New York before you know it.”

Clarke nods and turns her attention back to her mom. “How has your shopping been?”

“Lovely, thank you for asking!” She looks as though she’s been reminded of something and starts digging through her bag. She pulls out a few catalogs and hands them to Clarke.

Clarke narrows her eyes. “Why are you handing me catalogs for designer wedding dresses?”

“It’s never too early to start looking!” Abby smiles.

“Mom, Bellamy and I have been engaged for two months, but we’ve been apart basically the whole time. Are we not allowed to just enjoy this next step without thinking about planning a wedding?”

“You are absolutely allowed to do that! But I couldn’t help myself, and I think you should at least give them a browse.”

Clarke sighs as she flips through one of the catalogs. The dresses are beautiful, but she’s not going to get any of them. She just wants to appease her mother, even if only for a few minutes.

“All of these dresses cost a year’s worth of rent or more. I don’t need a dress that expensive if I’m only gonna wear it once.”

“But what does the price matter?”

“It matters to me, and I know it matters to Bellamy. We’re so grateful that you’d like to pay for our wedding, but we really don’t want an over-the-top affair. It doesn’t have to be uber expensive for it to still be nice.”

Abby sighs, but gives in. “You’re right, you’re right. I’ll work on reigning it in.”

“Thank you. And I know this is just your way of being excited.”

“Of course I’m excited! I’m so happy for you, sweetie. You and Bellamy are just the perfect fit, and I can’t wait to celebrate you two and your love.”

Clarke smiles and reaches across the table to take her mom’s hand. She’s glad that she and her mom seem to be on the same page about the wedding, at least at this moment in time.

Later that evening, Clarke Skypes with Bellamy for the first time since she landed in Italy. She drinks a cup of tea while he eats lunch at his desk.

“Has the trip been good so far?” Bellamy asks. “How much pasta have you eaten?”

“I have eaten pasta at least once a day, thank you for asking,” Clarke laughs. “And the trip has been pretty good. Niylah is amazing at her job, so I’m learning a lot.”

“That’s good! I’ll be excited to hear more about it once you’re back.”

“How’s your class going?”

“We’ve only had two meetings so far, but I’d say it’s going pretty well. They’re an inquisitive group, which I kind of figured they’d be, seeing as this is a class they offer during the year, but they opted to take it now.”

“Well it’s better than them being bored to tears.”

“True. My first office hours are today at 4, so we’ll see if anybody stops by.”

“You make every subject so interesting, I’m sure there’ll be an eager little history nerd knocking on your door,” Clarke jokes.

Bellamy chuckles. “Maybe. I feel like most of them will wait until it’s closer to their big paper being due.”

They sit quietly for a bit, allowing Bellamy a chance to work on eating his sandwich.

“How’s your mom?” he asks once he’s done chewing.

“Oh, she’s just being her usual self. I think I’ve talked her down from trying to plan the most extravagant wedding on the planet. But who knows how long that’ll last.”

“It’s cute how excited she is.”

Clarke rolls her eyes. “You’re only saying that because you’re not with her right now.”

“She’s your mom, Clarke. It’s literally her job to act like this when her only daughter is engaged.”

“I know! It’s just hard for me to think about all the planning and stuff when we’re still not living in the same place. I feel like we should focus on that first.”

“And I don’t disagree with you. But it’s just like we said when people kept asking us about getting engaged at Christmas. We’re going at our own pace. And if that answer is good enough for us, then it should be good enough for everyone else,” Bellamy declares.

“If only everyone else were as rational as we are!”

“But sadly, the world doesn’t work like that.”

Clarke smiles and tilts her head to the side. “I just want to be able to see you everyday without having to pick up my phone.”

“I know. Me too. But I’ll be finished with school soon, and we’ll be able to figure everything out then.”

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too, princess.”

Clarke knows that her future where she and Bellamy are in the same city isn’t too far off, but it still feels like a distant dream. At this point, she doesn’t care where they are, just as long as they’re together.

Clarke and Niylah wrap up the second week of their trip in Florence. They’re eating breakfast together before their last meeting when Niylah thanks Clarke for all her hard work.

“I really appreciate your help with this trip, Clarke,” Niylah says as she spreads Nutella on her toast.

“It’s been a great learning experience. Thank you for trusting me to do this with you.”

“Of course. I wouldn’t have asked anyone else.”

Clarke blushes and stares down at her food. It means a lot to her that Niylah sees her as capable and willing to learn.

“In fact, there’s another project I’d like to start that I think you’d be perfect for,” Niylah continues.

“Really?”

“Yes. I know you’ve spent some time near San Francisco, since your fiancé is in graduate school nearby.”

Clarke nods, not sure where this is headed.

“I’ve been wanting to expand to other parts of the country for a while now, and it seems like the right time to do it. This fall I’d like to look into potential locations for a second gallery in San Francisco, and I want you to be my scout. And if you’re interested, you’d be in charge of running the new gallery space.”

Clarke’s left speechless. This is a golden opportunity for her career, and she’s honored that Niylah specifically wants her to run it, especially when there are other people that work at the gallery who are older and have more experience.

“I would definitely be interested. Thank you so much, Niylah,” Clarke finally answers.

Niylah smiles. “I knew you’d be excited at the prospect. And I figured you’d jump at the chance to spend some more time with Bellamy.”

“I’m not gonna lie, that’s definitely a big part of why I find this project so exciting,” Clarke laughs. “But it sounds like a great opportunity, and I appreciate you thinking of me.”

“Of course.”

Clarke can’t seem to stop smiling for the rest of the day. She knows it’s not a sure thing, but this job could mean that she and Bellamy would be living in the same place for the first time ever in their relationship. How can she not be excited at the thought of that? She decides not to say anything to Bellamy until she has more information. She doesn’t want to get his hopes up if it doesn’t end up working out. But for now, she can relish in the fact that her forever with Bellamy might get to start sooner than she’d anticipated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed! I'd love to hear what you think, so leave a comment or come talk to me on [Tumblr.](https://mylifeiskara.tumblr.com/)
> 
> And thank you so much again for reading along! We've only got one more chapter left, which I'm hoping to get out to you guys soon.


	4. Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Wednesday! Super excited to share this last chapter with you guys. :)

_Monty and Harper’s wedding took place at a restored barn in upstate New York. It was a perfect day in early June, just before it got muggy. Everyone was excited to celebrate the happy couple. They were college sweethearts that you couldn’t help but root for, even if you’d only known them for a few months, which was the case for Bellamy. He was happy to be even a small part of their wedding weekend, especially because he got to spend time with Clarke._

_Meeting Clarke’s college friends was a bit weird for Bellamy at first, considering they were also his little sister’s college friends. Clarke introduced him to Monty, Harper, and Jasper when he was home for spring break. They were quick to welcome him into their group, and it was easy to feel like he’d been friends with them all along too. _

_Bellamy sat next to one of Monty’s family members during the ceremony, since Clarke was in the wedding. His breath caught as she walked down the aisle with Jasper, a vision in a simple, gold satin dress. She winked at him as she walked by, and Bellamy couldn’t help but blush. _

_Harper looked beautiful in her white lace gown, but Bellamy only had eyes for the maid of honor. During the ceremony, he would catch Clarke’s eye and she’d send him a private smile before blushing and attempting to tuck a loose strand of hair into her bun. They only broke eye contact when Bellamy had to dig in his pocket for the tissue pack he was glad he decided to bring. All he could think about while Monty and Harper exchanged vows was one day getting to do the same with Clarke._

_Bellamy usually dreaded wedding receptions, but this one with Clarke’s friends—possibly even his friends— was actually loads of fun. He laughed along with the other guests at Jasper’s ridiculous, but heartfelt best man speech. He watched as Monty and Harper danced as though they were the only two people in the room. He even let Clarke pull him to the dance floor, a sight that made Octavia’s jaw drop to the ground._

_Even though he was having fun, he still had to convince Clarke to let him take a dance break. She was pretty tipsy, which brought out her bossy side. Bellamy didn’t mind it, but he knew his feet would appreciate the rest. He left Clarke on the dance floor with Raven and Octavia. He was happy to watch them flail around to the band while he sat down with a beer._

_Once he got his drink, he scanned the tables for someone he knew who wasn’t dancing, and noticed Murphy and Emori. He began to head in their direction, even though they only seemed interested in each other. Thankfully, Emori kissed Murphy and headed to join the others on the dance floor, so Bellamy wouldn’t have to feel like such a third wheel after all._

_Clarke knew Murphy through Raven, and through means unknown to Bellamy, Raven and Murphy somehow filtered into her college friend group. Bellamy wasn’t really sure how or why, but Murphy ended up being his favorite of Clarke’s group of friends. It might’ve had something to do with the fact that Murphy didn’t seem to be watching Bellamy’s every move the way the others did. He knew they were just trying to be protective, but Murphy’s passive attitude about Clarke’s new relationship, and most other things, was refreshing. The group’s general wariness of Bellamy seemed a bit unnecessary, seeing as one of their friends was literally his sister._

_Murphy raised his beer bottle as Bellamy took a seat. Bellamy returned the gesture, and they sat in silence as they watched the other partygoers dance. They looked on as their girlfriends took turns spinning each other around, while Raven, Harper, and Octavia laughed and cheered them on. Bellamy couldn’t help but chuckle to himself. He glanced over at Murphy to find him staring at Emori with the most unabashed look of love he had ever seen. It really struck Bellamy, since his impression of Murphy was that he wanted people to know how little he cared about things. Then he began to wonder if that’s how in love he looked when he stared at Clarke._

_“You ever just sit back and think about how lucky you are to be with the person you’re with?” Murphy asked, finally tearing his gaze away from Emori._

_Bellamy smiled. “Everyday.” _

_“Me too.” He went back to nursing his beer, and Bellamy assumed that was the end of the conversation. _

_“I didn’t think I’d wanna be with anyone forever,” Murphy continued. “But I would do forever with Emori. I mean, we probably won’t do all this wedding crap. It’s a cute look for Monty and Harper, but I’m not really sure it’s us.”_

_“You don’t need a wedding to show how much you love each other. You can just love each other,” Bellamy answered._

_“Exactly. The people I’ve been with in the past weren’t worth forever. And I guess they didn’t think I was worth forever, either. But Emori sees me. She gets me and doesn’t try to change what’s there. Nobody’s ever done that. She loves me for me, and that makes it all worth it, you know?”_

_Bellamy nodded. He had never had a long enough conversation with Murphy to ever hear him talk about Emori, but he liked hearing him open up. Even if he was probably only opening up because he was drunk._

_“How did you guys meet?” Bellamy asked._

_“Raven introduced her to all of us. She told us there was a cool girl she met at work, and she really wasn’t kidding. I honestly didn’t think she’d give me the time of day. But for once, it’s like the universe or whatever decided to smile on me and let me have this one.”_

_“I kind of feel that way about Clarke.”_

_Murphy chuckled. “You are so far gone for her, man. Don’t think I didn’t notice you guys ogling each other during the ceremony. Seriously, you haven’t even been together a full six months, but your love is somehow more sickening than Monty and Harper’s.”_

_“You were literally just telling me how much you love your girlfriend!”_

_“It’s not sickening when I do it.”_

_Bellamy snorted, but didn’t argue. “I mean, I know Clarke and I haven’t been together that long, but I know what I’m looking for, okay? I’ve been engaged before and it didn’t feel right. But with Clarke, I just have a feeling that this is it.”_

_“Just hold onto that feeling though, man. I don’t know how much Clarke would appreciate you proposing after six months,” Murphy mused._

_“Don’t worry. I’d rather finish school before thinking too much about getting married.”_

_For a bit, they just sat and kept watching people dance, but Murphy broke the silence one last time._

_“You’re really good for her, you know,” he said._

_Bellamy blushed and suddenly felt compelled to stare down at his hands._

_Murphy turned himself to face Bellamy before continuing. “No, seriously. When I first met Clarke, she was so closed off. But ever since she met you, it’s like she’s finally allowed herself to be happy. I mean, hell, she wouldn’t have invited anyone else to a wedding this soon into a relationship. And I think a big part of that is because you make her feel like she can open up.”_

_Bellamy shrugged, trying to play off Murphy’s statement like it wasn’t a big deal. _

_“All I do is listen,” he finally answered._

_“And sometimes that’s all someone needs. Just one person who’ll listen. Clarke’s never really had that before. You guys have a really good thing going, so don’t fuck it up.”_

_“Believe me, fucking it up is the last thing I wanna do.”_

_“Good.” _

_After that, Bellamy realized that this time Murphy was actually done with the conversation. He finished off his beer then headed to the dance floor. Bellamy watched as he picked Emori up from behind and spun her around. Her eyes sparkled as she laughed, turned to face her boyfriend, and took his hands so they could dance together. _

_Bellamy was so busy processing his first heart-to-heart with resident curmudgeon John Murphy, that he didn’t notice Clarke walking up to him with her hand outstretched._

_“Why do you look so sad?” she asked once she finally reached him._

_“I’m not sad,” he answered. “Just lost in thought.”_

_“Well cut that out and come dance with me. ‘Lovebug’ is playing, so it’s required.”_

_Bellamy grinned as he took Clarke’s hand and let her pull him back to the dance floor. He let his arms rest on her waist as she wrapped hers around his shoulders. They swayed in silence at first, Clarke resting her head on his chest._

_“Why were you so lost in thought?” Clarke asked eventually._

_“I just had an interesting conversation with Murphy. He sort of gave me the shovel talk.”_

_Clarked lifted her head and frowned. “Murphy gave you a shovel talk?”_

_Bellamy chuckled. “He didn’t actually threaten me. He mostly just told me not to fuck things up.”_

_“Well it’s been almost six months, and I’d say you’re definitely not in danger of fucking things up. Others have not been lucky enough to say the same.”_

_“Good to know.”_

_“And I’m sorry about Murphy. I can talk to him if you want.”_

_“No, it was actually kind of funny. I think he might be my favorite of your friends.”_

_Clarke laughed. “Interesting choice, but okay.”_

_“He cares a lot more than he lets on. And not just about Emori.”_

_“He just likes to think he’s being aloof and mysterious, but nobody wants to tell him that he doesn’t come off that way.”_

_“That’s valid.”_

_They swayed silently until the song ended and even though a more up tempo one began, they just kept swaying. Bellamy marveled at how right it felt. _

_“Thanks for bringing me this weekend,” he whispered before kissing the top of Clarke’s head._

_“Thanks for coming. And why wouldn’t I bring you?”_

_“I don’t know. Some people might say it’s too soon.”_

_Clarke lifted her head to look at him before answering. “Yeah. And I probably would have said something like that, too. I can’t really explain it, but things are different with you.”_

_Bellamy smiled. “I feel the same way.”_

_Clarke took Bellamy’s face in her hands and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. He wished he could deepen it, but he didn’t want to start making outin a room full of people he didn’t know very well._

_“I love you, Bell.”_

_“I love you too, princess.”_

_Clarke laid her head back on his chest and he rested his chin on top of her head. He had known for a while, but he knew even more in that moment that he really couldn’t fuck things up with Clarke. She was it for him. She was the one._

**________________________**

It’s the beginning of November, and Bellamy is knee-deep in preparing to defend his dissertation. He doesn’t think he’s been this nervous since he proposed to Clarke. He says as much when they have their Skype session a week before he’s set to defend.

“Bell, you’re gonna do great. Remember, you wrote the whole thing, so you know it like the back of your hand,” Clarke reassures him.

“Yeah, well when you put it so logically,” Bellamy jokes.

“That’s what I’m here for. To say logical things so that you remember that defending your dissertation is just you answering questions about a subject you love.”

“That’s true.”

“Think about it more like a conversation and less like a test.”

Bellamy smiles. “What would I do without you?”

Clarke laughs. “Well lucky for you, you’ll never have to find out.”

“Yes, very lucky. Hey, what time does your flight get in on Thursday?”

“Two pm your time.”

“And not that I don’t love that you’re coming a couple days early and then staying for two weeks, but what exactly is this work thing you’re doing for Niylah?”

“It’s another scouting trip, like what I did over the summer,” Clarke answers, waving it off like it’s not a big deal.

Bellamy nods, but he’s not convinced that’s all there is to it. Clarke usually goes into full detail about what’s going on at work, even if he doesn’t really know what she’s talking about. That can’t be all it is, but he figures if it’s important and he needs to know, she’ll tell him eventually. And it’s not like he isn’t keeping anything from her at the moment, either.

A few days ago, Bellamy’s advisor, who also happens to be the head of the History department, offered him a position as an assistant professor once he receives his degree. Bellamy was elated at the news at first, but realized almost immediately after that his fiancée still lives on the other side of the country. His plan had always been to graduate from Stanford and move back to the east coast to be with her. But it’s not like he hates Stanford. In fact, he loves it. Teaching there would be a dream, if he’s being completely honest with himself. It just makes things more complicated with Clarke.

He wants to be in the same place as her. The whole reason he felt ready to propose was that he knew he was almost finished with school, which meant they wouldn’t be apart that much longer. But if he ends up staying in California, who’s to say if they’ll ever end up in the same place at all? Needless to say, he couldn’t immediately accept the offer. Luckily he has some time to decide, and he’d rather bring this conversation up with Clarke in person. Just maybe after he’s finished defending his dissertation.

The first two days Clarke is in town, she asks to borrow Bellamy’s car to drive to San Francisco. Bellamy doesn’t mind, seeing as he needs to stay home and prepare for his dissertation defense on Monday, but it’s weird that they’re in the same place and he’s barely seen her. The first chance they really get to be together is on Sunday afternoon when Clarke insists Bellamy needs a break and orders them Chinese takeout.

Bellamy hates to admit it, but something feels off. Usually they’re great at sitting in silence and just being together, but this silence isn’t like the other ones. It’s making him feel even more guilty that he’s waiting to tell Clarke about his job offer, but he’s worried that saying something now will only make things worse.

“How are things going with you?” Bellamy asks, none too pleased that he’s resorted to small talk.

Clarke looks up from her fried rice, confusion spreading over her face.

“They’re okay,” she finally answers.

“That’s good.” He stares at his lo mein to hide the blush he can feel creeping up his face.

“What is up with you? You’re talking to me like we’ve been set up on a blind date.”

Bellamy sighs. “I don’t know. I guess I’m just a little in my head about tomorrow. And you’ve been here since Thursday and it feels like I haven’t seen you at all.”

Clarke reaches across the table and takes Bellamy’s hand. “Well tomorrow is all about you. All of your hard work over the past few years is about to pay off in a big way, and I can’t imagine a place I’d rather be than in the room cheering you on.”

“Well you probably shouldn’t actually cheer.”

“I’ll silently cheer, then. Can I bring a sign?”

Bellamy laughs. “I mean, I don’t think anyone is gonna stop you.”

Nobody stops her, which Bellamy is grateful for. It’s comforting that every time he looks in her direction during his presentation, she smiles and waves her “Almost there, Dr. Blake!” sign as a reminder. He has to work overtime to control his smile. Sure, history makes him happy, but not as much as Clarke makes him happy.

Throughout the rest of his defense, Bellamy remembers Clarke’s suggestion to think about it as just a conversation. He thinks about how much he loves his research as he answers questions from the committee. He takes an enormous amount of pride in his work, and he uses that energy to remind himself that he wouldn’t be here if not for all the people in the room wanting him to succeed.

Bellamy finds Clarke in the hallway as the committee deliberates. She squeals as she runs into his arms.

“My favorite nerd! I’m so proud of you!” she says, almost squeezing the air out of him.

“Will you let your favorite nerd breathe?” Bellamy jokes.

She lets go and reaches up to kiss him. “Sorry. I’m just so happy for you.”

“We don’t even know how I did yet.”

“I don’t see how you couldn’t have done well. I may not have always known what you were talking about in there, but I know enough to know that you sounded very smart and scholarly.”

Bellamy perks up. “I’ve never been called a scholar before.”

“I think after writing a 300-page paper you can call yourself a scholar, Bell,” Clarke informs him.

“Well thank you for believing in me.”

“I’m your fiancée. It’s my job.”

He presses a kiss to her hair, and they sit down to wait for the committee to finish deliberating. Logically, Bellamy knows that he did well, but with every passing minute he can’t help but think that there must have been something he stumbled on while answering questions or giving his initial presentation. That must be the only explanation for why they’re taking so long. He tries to ground himself by focusing on Clarke’s thumb rubbing circles into his hand.

After what feels like forever, his advisor steps into the hallway. Bellamy instinctively stands, bringing Clarke with him. His advisor is smiling, but that somehow still doesn’t seem to calm his nerves.

It’s not until Bellamy hears him go, “Congratulations, Dr. Blake,” that he can finally breathe again. Clarke pulls him into another hug while he processes what’s happening.

“Thank you so much, Charles,” Bellamy says after he finds his voice. He lets go of Clarke to shake the man’s hand.

“You’ve worked so hard. You deserve it.”

Bellamy takes a moment to thank the rest of the committee before heading off with Clarke to celebrate. He lets her drive, since it feels like his brain is short-circuiting from excitement.

Once they get back to his apartment, Bellamy decides to take a nap until he and Clarke go to dinner. He didn’t realize how exhausted he was until his head hit the pillow. He probably could have slept for longer, but a beeping noise wakes him up. Clarke must have set an alarm on her phone. He rolls over to see that she climbed into bed at some point. She doesn’t seem to hear the alarm, so he gently nudges her arm. She opens her eyes and flashes him a sleepy smile. He smiles back and lifts her hand to press a kiss to it. He’s so glad she could be here for him while he defended his dissertation. He’s so lost in being grateful that he almost forgets that he still hasn’t told her about his job offer. And just like that, the pit in his stomach has returned.

An hour later, they’re eating dinner at a nice restaurant in Palo Alto, Clarke’s treat. She insisted, since it’s Bellamy’s day. He’s trying his hardest to act like everything’s normal, but everything’s not normal. How is he supposed to drop this bomb on her when they’re supposed to be celebrating? And sure, him receiving a job offer is more cause for celebration, but it feels like just another reason to draw out their engagement, which is honestly the last thing Bellamy wants to do.

“You seem very lost in thought,” Clarke remarks. “I thought you’d be more animated now that your defense is finished.”

Bellamy sips his wine to procrastinate answering. “I am really happy about defending. I just have something else on my mind.”

“What is it?”

“So, you know my advisor Pike is the head of the History department?”

Clarke nods.

“In our last meeting a few days ago, he actually offered me a teaching job when I’ve fully graduated. I’d be an assistant professor for the undergrads.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I’ve been given some time to think about the offer. I love Stanford, and I don’t mind being in California, but I haven’t stopped looking at jobs on the east coast—”

Clarke cuts him off. “I think you should take it.”

Bellamy frowns. “What?”

“You heard me. I think you should take the job. You just said you love Stanford, and they’re literally offering you a chance to stay.”

“But you live in New York. I was gonna try and move back.”

She smiles. “You know how I’ve been doing scouting for work?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s not scouting for art pieces. I’ve been location scouting because Niylah wants to open another gallery in San Francisco. And she asked me to run it.”

Bellamy’s not sure he’s hearing this correctly. “You’re moving to San Francisco?”

“Not right away. There’s a lot of logistics to work out and that sort of thing, and I have to tie up loose ends in New York. But I will be moving to San Francisco in the foreseeable future.”

Bellamy beams at this news. He had been worried that him wanting to stay at Stanford would have been disappointing news for Clarke, but it turns out it’s the best case scenario.

“It seems like the universe really wanted this to work out for us,” he chuckles.

“I guess so. I was so nervous to tell you! I didn’t want you to get your hopes up if I told you too soon and it ended up not working out. And this week, I’ve wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to make you nervous before your presentation or make the day that’s supposed to be about you all about me,” she rambles.

“Clarke, it’s okay. I was nervous to tell you about my job thing, too. That’s part of why I was acting so weird the first few days you were here.”

She laughs. “You were being really strange.”

“What were we thinking? We know we can tell each other anything. And we’re always at our best when we work through things together.”

“Yeah. But we can use this as a learning experience, I guess.”

“And we have forever to get better at it.”

“Exactly.”

Bellamy’s convinced that learning he and Clarke are going to be in the same place might be better than him receiving his PhD. They’ve never been together consecutively for longer than two months in their entire two years together, and he can’t wait to see what being with Clarke all the time is like. He imagines it’ll be more of the same, but he’s excited to be able to actually kiss her rather than just wishing he could while they Skype. He pictures grading papers while she sketches with her feet in his lap. And waking up next to her everyday seems like something he’ll never get used to. They’re both so excited at the prospect of their future together, that it’s the topic of their pillow talk later that night.

“So how often do you actually make pancakes? Is that just a thing you do because you know I like them, or do you eat them when I’m not around?” Clarke asks as she lifts her head from where it was resting on his chest.

Bellamy chuckles. “I do tend to make them when I’m in a good mood. So I guess that’s why you end up eating them all the time. But I usually eat cereal or eggs.”

“What a boring and adult thing to do.”

“I mean, I am an adult. And some people have gone so far as to call me boring.”

“You could never be boring to me.” She kisses his cheek and then closes her eyes as she puts her head down again. He smiles and absentmindedly draws circles on her shoulder with his finger. After a few minutes, her eyes shoot wide open again.

“Aw, fuck!” she groans.

Bellamy runs through all the things they’ve said recently that might warrant an ‘aw fuck’ but he lands on that reaction just not making sense.

“Care to elaborate?” he finally asks.

“We can’t use the ‘we live on opposite sides of the country’ excuse to put off wedding planning anymore.”

“I thought you wanted a wedding?”

“I don’t know what I want. I just know I don’t want my mom breathing down my neck 24/7 about it. Which is what it’s gonna turn into once we announce our job news.”

“Well we don’t have to announce our job news right away.”

“Or we could just get married,” Clarke suggests.

Bellamy raises an eyebrow and looks down at Clarke. “You’re not serious.”

Clarke sits up. Even she seems shocked she suggested it. “I am. I am serious. We should just get married.”

“But what about your wedding fund?”

“Bellamy, I don’t give two shits about my wedding fund. I don’t really give a shit about a wedding, the more I think about it. All I want is to be married to you. And the fact that we actually know we’re going to be in the same place is all the more reason to just do it.”

“All I want is to be married to you, too,” Bellamy admits.

“Great. I’m here for another week. Let’s get married.” She pulls back the covers and gets out of bed. She throws on a t-shirt that was on the floor and then hands Bellamy his laptop.

“I mean, whatever you want. But what about your mom? What about our friends?” he asks as he opens his computer.

Clarke shrugs. “I think they’ll be too happy for us to be _that_ mad. And my mom will just want to throw us a party at some point. She’s never gonna let go of the wedding fund completely.”

“Okay. What should I google?”

“See if we need to get the marriage license in advance, or if we can get it the day of.”

Bellamy types a few things into Google, still a little shocked that they’re considering this.

“It looks like in San Francisco, you can make an appointment to get a marriage license and have the ceremony on the same day,” he answers.

“When’s the next available appointment?”

“Wednesday at noon.”

“Wow. That’s soon.”

“We don’t have to get married on Wednesday, Clarke,” Bellamy reminds her.

“No, I want to.” She turns to face him. “Do you want to?”

“I’ve wanted to marry you for the better part of two years, so if you want to get married on Wednesday, I want to get married on Wednesday.”

Her face lights up and she leans over his laptop to give him a kiss.

“Book the appointment,” she says.

Bellamy grins as he fills out the appointment form. He notices Clarke fooling around on her phone and lets out a snort as she turns on ‘Marry You’ by Bruno Mars. He’s getting married on Wednesday. It wasn’t at all part of the plan or what he expected, but he and Clarke have never done things by the book. He’s glad they’re going to start their life together in the same manner.

**_______________________**

Bellamy can’t believe they’re actually doing this. He’s fidgety, but in the best way. In just a couple of hours, he’ll be able to call Clarke Griffin his wife. They don’t have everything figured out like they thought they would, and Clarke has to go back to New York to get things situated before she can actually move out to California, but this just feels right.

The day before had been a flurry of activity as they got ready for their courthouse appointment. After breakfast, they headed out for the day, first to pick out rings. Once that was done, Clarke insisted on going off on her own to buy a nice dress, telling Bellamy he wasn’t allowed to see it until tomorrow. While she shopped, Bellamy met up with Miller for coffee and asked if he’d like to be their witness. Miller was thrilled and honored to be a part of their very quickly thrown together day. Then Bellamy went to do some shopping of his own, though he wasn’t sure what he should wear to a courthouse wedding. He just ended up picking out a new tie and decided that was enough.

Clarke has a habit of taking Bellamy’s breath away, but when she walks back in from the bathroom in a knee-length white lace dress and her hair pulled back into a loose bun, Bellamy has to sit down because he can’t seem to find any air in his lungs. He is so in love with this woman, and they’re getting married today. And he’s already crying. Clarke sits down next to him and wraps her arms around him. She presses kisses to his face and whispers ‘I love yous’ until they’re kissing a little too much and they have to stop, or they’ll be late for their appointment.

They hold hands the entire drive to San Francisco. It takes a lot of energy for Bellamy to actually focus on the road as he drives, so it’s a wonder they make it there in one piece. They walk hand-in-hand up the steps of City Hall, where Miller is waiting for them. He hands Clarke a small bouquet as he greets them, and the three of them head inside to check in.

Bellamy’s stomach is filled with butterflies as they wait their turn. He checks to make sure the rings are in his pocket, even though he checked multiple times before they left the apartment. He registers that Clarke and Miller are having an animated conversation, but he doesn’t have any idea what it’s about. Miller makes a joke, and Bellamy’s heart almost bursts taking in his almost-wife’s radiant laugh.

When they’re finally called up, Bellamy practically jumps out of his seat, pulling Clarke with him since they’re still holding hands. He just wants to be married, already! Thankfully, since it’s a courthouse ceremony, he doesn’t have much longer to wait.

Bellamy has been in love with Clarke for a long time, but he’s never felt more in love with her than he does while they’re exchanging vows. He can feel himself welling up as she slides the gold band onto his left ring finger. Once the ring is on, she reaches up with her hand to wipe his eyes, tears forming in her own as well. The officiant can barely finish pronouncing them husband and wife before Bellamy is surging forward to plant a kiss on his wife’s lips.

“You’re my wife!” Bellamy grins. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of saying that.

“You’re my husband!” Clarke laughs in response. She pulls him in again, but they’re both grinning too much for it to be that good of a kiss. They don’t really mind.

Miller offers to take some pictures of them, which they’re grateful that he remembered. It’ll probably soften the blow of their friends and family finding out they got married without them if they have at least a couple of nice photos to remember the day by.

“I don’t even have to tell you guys to look in love. You do it so well on your own,” Miller jokes as he snaps some candids on his phone.

Once their brief photoshoot is over, they thank Miller for coming and head their separate ways. Bellamy and Clarke decide to have lunch at their favorite San Francisco diner. It has the cute feel of a vintage diner with everything except the prices, but it’s their wedding day, so it feels appropriate to splurge. Since it’s the middle of the day on a Wednesday, their usual booth isn’t taken. Bellamy slides in first, and Clarke sits down next to him. They normally don’t sit on the same side, but today seems like as good a day as any to be close to each other.

Once they’ve ordered their food, Clarke rests her head on Bellamy’s shoulder. He puts his head on top of hers and takes her left hand in his. He watches as Clarke smiles down at their matching rings. With her other hand she fidgets with one of the napkins on the table. She definitely has something on her mind.

“What are you thinking?” Bellamy asks.

“We have to tell people,” she responds.

“Yeah. Let’s not start with your mom.”

Clarke snorts. “Of course not. But we can tell her when we get home.”

Bellamy grins. She’d never called his apartment her home before. This still doesn’t feel real to him, even though he knows it is.

“Why don’t we just tell the whole group at once?” Clarke suggests.

“That’s probably smart. Let them get all of their questions out of the way.”

She nods and takes out her phone. She lifts her head and left hand, motioning for Bellamy to do the same. She makes her signature selfie face, while Bellamy just smiles like normal. Clarke types out a caption and sends the photo in the group chat.

**Clarke**

_Happy Wednesday._

Octavia’s reply is almost instantaneous.

**Octavia**

_WHAT THE FUCK!!!!_

_IS THIS A JOKE??!!!_

Bellamy laughs at his sister’s response and types out one of his own.

_Do you want a picture of our marriage license?_

**Jasper**

_DR. AND MRS. BLAKE!!!_

_YOU ARE PERFECT!_

_THIS DAY IS PERFECT!_

**Harper**

_OMG CONGRATULATIONS YOU GUYS!_

**Monty**

_YES! We finally have married friends!_

**Raven**

_You guys! Stop, I’m gonna cry!_

**Emori**

_Congrats! So happy for you! :)_

**Murphy**

_What the hell, Blake? _

_How could you one-up me like this?_

_I’ll have you know this was Clarke’s idea!_

**Clarke**

_Can confirm, it was my idea._

**Octavia**

_I’m so happy for you guys that I’m only a little bit upset you got married without telling me._

**Clarke**

_Well, that’s a better reaction than what my mom’s is going to inevitably be._

**Murphy**

_Wait a second._

_Is this a shotgun wedding?_

_Is Clarke pregnant?_

**Emori**

_Shut up, John!_

**Murphy**

_Come on, don’t act like I was the only one wondering._

**Raven**

_(I also briefly had the same thought.)_

**Clarke**

_No Murphy, I am not pregnant._

_We’re just in love._

**Murphy**

_Gross._

**Raven**

_Says the man who told us he had to leave happy hour early so he could go home and cuddle his sick fiancée._

**Murphy**

_Reyes, now is not the time._

Bellamy chuckles as their friends continue to argue over text. He turns to his wife, who just smiles and kisses him on the cheek.

“Well that wasn’t so bad,” he says.

“Nope,” Clarke answers. “But I didn’t think it would be. They love us too much.”

“I wonder how much they’ll love us when we tell them we’re moving to San Francisco full time,” Bellamy wonders aloud.

“Let’s save that conversation for a different day. I just want to relish in the fact that you’re my husband and we get to spend forever together.”

“I love you so much, do you know that?”

Clarke laughs. “Well duh. You married me, remember?”

Bellamy laughs. He’s only slightly worried that his face might be stuck in a permanent grin, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. He’s in awe that he gets to spend forever with this woman and that their forever starts today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone wondering, I fully modeled Bellamy and Clarke's selfie off of [these](https://the-morleys.tumblr.com/post/186401599455/some-things-never-change).
> 
> Anyway, thank you all so, so much for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos on this fic! I've loved seeing your thoughts and getting excited about Bellarke with you guys. If you're interested in Bellamy and Clarke's playlist, you can listen to it [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0MN2EDovA4fJXG6wwJb8Fc?si=YONr3IZFRbGRbZpNJD4FXA).
> 
> As always, I love to hear what you think, and you can talk to me in the comments or on [Tumblr!](https://sassmasterblake.tumblr.com/) I always post there when I've got something new in the works, so stay tuned, because I have some other Bellarke Bingo ideas and things I'm excited to work on.


	5. New Year's Eve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Murphy knows how much Emori loves New Year's Eve. Since she did such a special thing for him last year, he hopes that he can do something special in return to start off the new year right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! It's another chapter! I wanted to write something for New Year's Eve, and I saw the opportunity for some Memori fluff, and I took it. I'm Memori trash first and a person second, so I can't be stopped. Hope you enjoy!

_Emori’s always loved New Year’s Eve. She calls it a night of infinite possibilities. She’s loved New Year’s even more since she and John started dating. Every New Year’s that she’s had with him has been memorable. _

_Their first one together was the first time they exchanged ‘I love you’s.’ It was her first time spending it with her new group of friends. They were in a crowded bar, all a lot drunker than was probably appropriate, but so was everybody else, so it was a non-issue. Their group was in the corner by the TV, which was tuned to watch the ball drop. Emori stood with John, his arms wrapped around her from behind. He pressed a kiss to her head as she stared intently at the screen, then whispered an ‘I love you’ into her ear. Emori grinned and turned to look at John before saying it back and planting a kiss on his lips seconds before the ball dropped._

_Their second one was the first time the group went to Monty and Harper’s apartment, rather than go out to a bar. She and John were a force to be reckoned with during literally every game they played. Emori had never been part of a group of friends like this before, so even though they weren’t at some flashy party or anything like that, it was still special._

_For their third New Year’s Eve together, Emori had a surprise planned. Sure, she loved the group celebration, but she didn’t see anything wrong with wanting to have John all to herself. He was her boyfriend, after all. They’re also the group wild cards, so nobody was surprised when Emori texted them (excluding John) to let them know that the two of them would not be in attendance._

_She didn’t tell him much, just that he should wear something a little nicer than jeans and to make sure he put on a warm coat. He frowned at the no jeans suggestion, but shrugged and pulled out a pair of nicer pants anyway. He trusted her. Emori put on a black sweater, her red plaid pants, and a pair of boots. She liked her red plaid pants, but she also knew that they were John’s favorite. Sure enough, once she came back into the living room, his eyes immediately roamed to her legs as an impish grin spread across his face. He got up from his chair and crossed the room to wrap his arms around her waist and kiss her._

_“You’re radiant,” he smiled._

_Emori laughed. “Radiant, huh? That’s a new adjective for you.”_

_“I can’t always use beautiful and gorgeous. Have to keep you guessing.” He untangled himself from her to show off his outfit. “How’d I do?”_

_Emori surveyed his simple khakis and navy sweater. He was wearing sneakers, but she didn’t feel like coaxing him into a nicer pair of shoes._

_“You look ready to meet someone’s parents,” she finally said._

_“And that’s a good thing for what we’re doing?”_

_“I’d say so. We have to blend in.”_

_John frowned. “Blend in? Where the fuck are we going?”_

_“You’ll see!” She pushed him towards their hall closet so they could get their coats on and head to the crowded subway._

_Their first stop once they left their apartment was the liquor store on the corner. They bought two bottles of champagne, which Emori stored in her big bag. She had also stored away some plastic champagne flutes for when they got to their destination. The next stop was their favorite pizza place, where they ordered a large pepperoni pizza to go. Once they had their pizza, Emori led them towards the 96th Street subway station so they could get on the train. She felt John’s hand tense up in hers as she led him to the downtown 1 train’s platform._

_“Emori,” he began cautiously. “Are you taking me to Midtown? On New Year’s Eve?”_

_“Our destination is in Midtown, but I promise you’re going to love it.”_

_“What is there to love about crowds of tourists?”_

_“Once we get to where we’re going it won’t be crowded. You trust me, right?”_

_He sighed. “Yes.”_

_“Then just go with it and know I would never lead you astray. We’re getting off by Port Authority anyways.”_

_He nodded as the train pulled into the station. They didn’t say anything on the way, but Emori could tell that John was still a bit nervous about where they were going. She gave his hand a squeeze and continued to lead the way as they switched to the A train at Columbus Circle to avoid Times Square._

_They arrived at the Port Authority station, and were met immediately with an onslaught of confused foot traffic from people who thought it would be a good idea to spend their New Year’s in New York City. Being up on the ground it made sense why John seemed so worried. Their group had done a great job of avoiding Midtown in all their New Year’s plans. Emori was sure John was wishing that they were in Morningside Heights with the others, but she knew he’d change his mind once he saw what they’d be doing._

_Her hand still intertwined with his, she walked them up to the Westin Hotel. As they neared the front door, John stopped walking and finally spoke up._

_“Okay, I know we’re not as broke as we used to be, but we can’t afford to stay at this hotel.”_

_Emori turned to face her boyfriend. She could see the confusion on his face wasn’t going away anytime soon, so she figured they were close enough to the surprise to spill the beans._

_“You are being oddly skeptical today, so I’m just gonna fill you in. I have a friend who works at the Westin, and she helped me arrange a way to get us roof access. We just have to be discreet and look like we’re guests of the hotel.”_

_Recognition finally flashed on John’s face as he put together all of Emori’s weird requests and stops._

_“Can we get going now? We don’t want the pizza to be less than room temperature.”_

_“In a second,” he smiled as he stepped in to kiss her. “I love you.”_

_Emori blushed. “I love you, too. Now come on so we can eat.”_

_John didn’t protest anymore and just followed Emori’s lead. They walked into the hotel and to the concierge desk. She smiled at her friend, who was thankfully working that evening._

_“What can I help you with?” she asked._

_“Do you know of any places we could watch the fireworks?” Emori asked with a wink._

_“Yes, there are actually some great rooftop bars nearby. I’ll write down a few for you,” her friend answered. _

_She scribbled a few things on a piece of paper, which she handed to Emori along with an envelope. Emori took the envelope and slipped cash into the other woman’s hand._

_“Thanks so much,” Emori smiled, as she led John to the elevators. _

_They got on and rode all the way up to the 45th floor. Thankfully when they got off, the floor seemed fairly deserted. She motioned for John to follow her to a door at the end of the hallway that read, ‘Do Not Enter’. Once they were in front of it she checked again to make sure nobody was around, then pushed the door open. She assumed John was right behind her, but when she turned to check, she noticed he was still in the doorway, staring at her in open-mouthed adoration._

_“John, what are you doing? We can’t be seen!” she whispered._

_“Sorry.” He followed her through the doorway and closed it behind them. “Have I told you recently that you’re amazing?”_

_She rolled her eyes. “Save your flattery for when we get there.”_

_They climbed two short flights of stairs before they reached another door. Emori opened the envelope the concierge handed her and pulled out a key. She put it in the lock, and the door opened, allowing them to step onto the roof. _

_Once they were outside, Emori walked over to the table and two chairs her friend had set up. She dug around in her bag for one of the blankets she’d stashed to use as a tablecloth and laid it down. Next she pulled out the first bottle of champagne and the plastic flutes. _

_“Bring the pizza over!” she said, looking up from the table._

_John was slightly preoccupied with staring out at the city over the roof, but he did eventually bring the pizza over to the table. He pulled a chair out and gestured for Emori to take a seat with an over the top flourish. She laughed as she sat down. He popped the champagne bottle and poured them each a glass before sitting down himself._

_“I know you’re hungry, but I’d like to propose a toast first,” he said, lifting his glass._

_“Fine, but make it quick.”_

_“To New Year’s Eve with my partner in crime. Here’s hoping we don’t get arrested for trespassing.”_

_“Cheers,” Emori chuckled. She clinked her glass to his and took a sip. Then she opened the pizza box and made quick work of her first slice before saying much else._

_John was being uncharacteristically quiet. He usually had lots of things to say, and Emori thought he’d be way more talkative once they got to the roof, especially since they could hear everything going on in Times Square. She watched as he chewed on his pizza, seeming deep in thought._

_“John? Is everything okay?” she asked._

_“Yeah. Why do you ask?”_

_“You’re just being really quiet, and I got worried. Do you not like this? Would you rather have gone to Monty and Harper’s with the others?”_

_He scooted his chair closer to hers so he could take her hand more easily._

_“Emori, I love this! This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”_

_She let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “Really?”_

_“Yeah. There’s a great view, and it’s like we’ve got front row seats to this Times Square nonsense without having to be in throngs of people.”_

_“Then why do you look so sad?”_

_“I didn’t mean to look sad. I’m just floored that you went through so much trouble to do this for me.”_

_“John, I care about you! And I wanted to do a nice thing for you. We’ve both been so busy lately, and this seemed like the perfect time to get you alone.”_

_“It is perfect. I love it. And if we do end up getting caught, just know there’s nobody else I’d rather get arrested with.”_

_“You’re so romantic.” _

_She leaned in to kiss him. His lips met hers eagerly as one hand took residence in her hair, while the other pulled her chair closer so he could help situate her on his lap. It wasn’t the smoothest transition, since John didn’t seem too keen to stop kissing her, but she made it eventually. The kiss deepened, as she opened her mouth to let his tongue in. She didn’t know how long they made out, but John pulled away eventually to catch his breath. He pressed his forehead to hers._

_“Damn, it’s too bad it’s cold out, or I would’ve suggested we have sex,” he joked._

_Emori laughed before pressing another quick kiss on his lips. She got off his lap, despite his protests, so that she could get the second blanket and pour them more champagne. She settled back in her own chair and wrapped the blanket around them. She rested her head on John’s shoulder, and he put his head on top of hers in response._

_By now, it was getting close to midnight, so they listened to all the commotion below as everyone got ready for the countdown to begin._

_“This is the best New Year’s Eve I’ve ever had,” John said as the people below began counting down from 10._

_“So you like your surprise?” she asked._

_“Of course. But it’s the best because I get to spend it with you.”_

_Emori turned to him and was struck by how earnest the look on his face was. She had never been more in love with somebody than she was in that moment. She leaned in to kiss him as the clock struck midnight. So much shouting was going on down below, but it’s almost as if they were in their own little bubble and Emori couldn’t hear any of it._

_“Happy New Year, John.”_

_“Happy New Year, Emori.”_

_They sat together and finished the bottle of champagne as they watched the fireworks. They really did have a great view. She wished the night would never end, but she knew they did eventually have to sneak back off the roof before actual hotel guests arrived back from their own celebrating. She was just glad that she got to spend time with John and that he was happy._

**____________________**

Murphy paces the apartment as he waits for Emori to get dressed. It’s New Year’s Eve, and they’re going to hang out with their friends at Monty and Harper’s. They especially have to put in an appearance since they didn’t go last year. They’re already running late (not that their friends don’t expect that from them), and it seems like she’s taking a lot longer to get ready than usual. In theory, Emori is probably taking the same amount of time she always takes, but he’s just nervous since he wants to propose before they leave.

Before he met Emori, Murphy figured he’d spend his life by himself. He didn’t get how anyone was able to let their guard down enough to let someone in like that. Every time he’d tried to be vulnerable in the past, he’d ended up hurt. He’d pretty much resigned himself to be alone, but then he met Emori. She can match his sarcasm at the drop of a hat, she’s fiercely loyal, and she’s the first person he’s ever dated who has fully accepted him for the jaded curmudgeon that he is.

They’ve been together for almost four years now, and though it would be a lie to say they haven’t had rocky moments, the years Murphy’s spent with Emori have definitely been the best of his life. When they first got together, they discussed that neither of them could see marriage in their future, but that didn’t matter much to either of them, since it was more important that they were committed to each other. As time passed, they became more and more open to the idea of marriage, especially after being a part of Monty and Harper’s wedding day. It no longer seemed like something they just wanted to rule out, but they would obviously do it their way.

Emori did such a nice thing for Murphy last year that he wants to do something for her this year in return, and he figured proposing might be a way to top her evening, even if he didn’t have anything elaborate planned. He knows he doesn’t need anything elaborate. The point is they’re in love, and Murphy can’t picture spending the rest of his life with anyone else but Emori.

He only really knows one couple who’s married, and that’s Monty and Harper. So far, Monty is the only one that knows Murphy plans to propose to Emori, and that’s mainly because he wanted to get advice from someone who had done it before. He could have asked Bellamy, but since that engagement didn’t stick, he wasn’t so sure that was a good idea. Monty’s advice was to keep it simple. When he proposed to Harper, he took her out to dinner, then a walk in the park near their apartment is where he popped the question.

Murphy knows Emori well enough to know that she’d probably rather not get proposed to in public, for a myriad of reasons. He hadn’t even been sure if he should get her a ring. She’s always expressed how much she loves other people’s engagement rings before then looking down at her own left hand to see her fused together ring and middle fingers. They were like that when she was born, and she’s now unbothered by what other people think after years of being self-conscious about it. But she’s admitted that there are days where it feels like she’s backtracked and it’s on her mind. He eventually settled on getting her a ring, because he knows that deep down she wants one, and she can put it on her right hand. Hell, he’ll wear his wedding band on his right hand if it’ll make her feel better. But then again, he has to actually propose first.

He finally stops pacing and sits down in his chair to keep waiting for Emori. He figures he still has a few more minutes to wait, so he pulls the ring box out of his pocket and looks at the ring for the umpteenth time. It’s pretty simple, just a diamond and then a gold band. He knows she wouldn’t want anything too flashy. It’s while he’s staring at the ring that he hears the door to their bedroom open. He quickly pockets the box and jumps up from his seat as Emori enters the room.

She stops moving and frowns, probably because Murphy stood up way too quickly. He can’t help it, he’s nervous. She’s paired a red dress with her favorite leather jacket and the boots she always wears, and it’s crazy to Murphy how she can look so good in something so simple. He crosses the room to give her a kiss on the cheek.

“Hi,” he smiles.

“We haven’t been apart that long, but hi anyways,” she chuckles. “Are you ready to go?”

“Yeah, I just need to do something first.”

“Okay. Go ahead.”

Murphy lets out a breath before taking Emori’s hand and moving them further into their living room by the window. She’s clearly confused, but she lets it happen.

“It’s right about now that I’m wishing we got that apartment with the cute balcony, but this’ll have to do,” he says as he gets down on one knee.

Emori’s eyes widen. “John?”

Murphy can feel his eyes watering, but he’s determined to get through this without crying.

“Emori, I love you so much. You’re my favorite person, my best friend, my partner in crime.”

She laughs at that, but lets him continue.

“I never thought I’d find anyone that I’d want to spend the rest of my life with. Then I met you, and I can’t say I changed my mind immediately, but it was a pretty quick turnaround. I’m not perfect, and I don’t pretend to be, but you make me want to do better. And I know without a doubt in my mind that you’re the person I want to spend forever with.”

As Murphy pulls the ring box from his pocket and opens it, he feels the first tears fall, but he can’t bring himself to care.

“Emori, will you marry me?” he asks.

Emori smiles, and Murphy can see tears forming in her eyes too. She kneels on the ground next to him to hug him and press a kiss to his lips.

“So is that a yes?”

She laughs. “Yes. I’ll marry you!”

A huge grin spreads across Murphy’s face as he takes Emori’s right hand and slides the ring onto her finger. She holds her hand up to admire it.

“It’s perfect, John. I love it.”

“I’m glad,” he says. “So, you really think you can love me forever?”

“I’ll love you forever even if we die today,” Emori answers. “I mean, with the amount the train has been breaking down lately, we really could die today.”

Murphy laughs. “Don’t jinx it when we’re about to get on the train!”

“Oh, I don’t think we’re getting on the train just yet.”

He grins and catches her lips with his. She easily positions herself on top of him and pushes him down so he’s on his back. Murphy’s not sure how long they’re like that, but he does remember they have somewhere to be when Emori’s hands roam to underneath his shirt.

“As much as I would love to stay right here, we’re going to get made fun of if we’re much later to this party,” Murphy says as he catches his breath.

“Ugh, you’re probably right. Let me fix my lipstick,” she says as she clambers off of him.

He follows her to the bathroom, since he’s probably got lipstick on his face as well. They fix themselves in relative silence.

“Hey, we got engaged before Bellamy and Clarke,” Emori points out as she brushes her hair.

Murphy chuckles. He hadn’t really thought of that. “Bellamy’s gonna be pissed. Obviously, he’ll stew silently, but we’ll know that he’s pissed, and that’s what matters.”

Once they’re done in the bathroom, they head back into the living room. Emori gets on her coat while Murphy grabs the bottle of champagne he had planned to bring.

“Do you think everyone’s gonna be surprised?”

“Everyone except for Monty, since I told him. And Harper, because I’m sure Monty told her. But I think they all expect us to just not get married.”

They lock their apartment and head out into the street towards the subway hand-in-hand.

“I think that’s my favorite thing about us,” Emori muses. “That we keep people on their toes.”

“Yeah, we’ll never be boring,” Murphy agrees.

Murphy’s heart feels ready to burst as he walks with his fiancée down the street. He’s got something special with Emori, and he’s never taken much time to question what exactly she sees in him (and he’s definitely not going to start), but he’s so glad that she’s chosen him too. He’s never been one to get all that sappy, but he can’t wait to see what their forever holds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! Hope you guys enjoyed this extra chapter! Let me know what you think.
> 
> I've got some fun things planned fic-wise for 2020, so stay tuned. And for now, you can always come find me on [Tumblr](https://sassmasterblake.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
